Thank you for writing in to Just Answer.
I'm very sorry to hear what you are going through.
I think first of all, you are clearly feeling very overwhelmed and essentially unappreciated. That is not an easy place to be in. I understand what it might feel like to not be able to find your place or not be able to find something you can excel in - but that definitely does not mean you're not good at anything. It seems like this particular college may not be suiting you or that the courses you are taking are not ones where your strengths lie. You mentioned that you considered yourself creative - have you tried to talk to your professor in the creative/writing classes about where you are lacking? Perhaps you are still very good but simply need to work on certain areas.
I know it can feel overwhelming with your diagnosis of Bipolar II but there are many many people out there who are living normal lives in spite of their Bipolar diagnosis. What I'm saying is that with proper treatment (medication if appropriate plus therapy) it is definitely possible to minimize the impact of Bipolar and to lead a high functioning life. Indeed many very talented artists and others have been known throughout history to have experienced both depression and manic episodes.
It sounds like your college isn't an inspiring or enjoyable experience for you but again think back to your community college days. You did great there right? So it's simply a matter of finding an environment where you feel comfortable. Or talking to your professors and asking them for guidance and help. There is nothing wrong in asking for help and many professors will be very happy to see that you are trying hard even though you might be struggling.
Please don't push yourself in to believing that you have no options, or that your diagnosis will impede your ability to work. That is definitely not true of everybody. You certainly have many options available to you - it's just a matter of assessing what your needs are and then making some choices.
I'm not sure what kind of therapy you are in but cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) would be a good model to consider as it helps you identify your self-talk or limiting beliefs that might be leading to your feeling so overwhelmed and defeated. Here's an excellent workbook
that teaches you how to use cognitive behavioral therapy to address depression.
I hope this was helpful. Please let me know if you have additional questions/thoughts to what I wrote above. Please also consider clicking Accept if this was helpful as experts are not credited for their time or service otherwise.