How JustAnswer Works:
  • Ask an Expert
    Experts are full of valuable knowledge and are ready to help with any question. Credentials confirmed by a Fortune 500 verification firm.
  • Get a Professional Answer
    Via email, text message, or notification as you wait on our site.
    Ask follow up questions if you need to.
  • 100% Satisfaction Guarantee
    Rate the answer you receive.
Ask Dr. Mark Your Own Question
Dr. Mark
Dr. Mark , Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5220
Experience:  Dr. Mark is a PhD in psychology in private practice
Type Your Mental Health Question Here...
Dr. Mark is online now
A new question is answered every 9 seconds

My wife left and has been acting very different. She was a

Resolved Question:

My wife left and has been acting very different. She was a Christian woman with great morals and a deep love for me (her husband) and our beautiful daughter. Her mother has been diagnosed with manic depressive psychosis. My wife has told me she does not love me. She says she has never been happy with me. She is blocking out everything good that has happened in our marriage and even dating. She is blowing every little thing completely out of proportion. She says that I never help her, and I don't help with her daughter, and she feels like she is raising our daughter by herself. I have helped her and am always appreciative to her for everything. She says she's depressed and feels so low. A Week before she left she wanted to be a stay at home mom and now she wants to work. 3 months ago she had a miscarriage. The day after, a guy told her she should leave me for him, but she left and didn't go to him. She says she just wants to be alone. Everyone that knows her thinks this is way put of her character. Her mom acts this way all the time. I am afraid that she has a genetic psychological problem. Based upon the background I have provided, what is your opinion? Do you think she could have bd? If so is their anyway to get her to understand that she may have a problem? She always said she did not want to act in the manner that her mother has. She may not want to face the problem if she is noticing it because of those feelings. I have also noticed alot of changes over the last 18 months (which is when we had our daughter). She has been bossy and controling. Lately her sex drive has been up and down (since the miscarriage). She also has lost interest in things we always liked to do, in fact she finds things to be down about in everything. Since she has left, she tells me she is at peace. She has went out with friends bowling and shopping and leaving our daughter at her mothers (which is where she is staying) telling me I can not see her. She has been disregarding our daughter (whom I know she still loves) and is going places she would never dare go before. I saw pictures on facebook of her with her friends and alcohol on the table in front of them. Prior to her leaving, she never touched alcohol in her life, or even tobacco for that matter. I am scared not only of losing my family but also for my wife knowing she could have a terrible life ahead of her and also for my daughter because her life will be severely changed by the divorce and I want her to be raised in anhome that will teach her morals and help her to build a good character. Im sorry to write so long of a message. I wanted to give you information to base your answer upon.

Thank you
Darron combs
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Dr. Mark replied 5 years ago.

Hi! I believe I can be of help with this issue.

First, let me say I can imagine how confusing and distressing this situation must be for you. You are clearly a caring and loving husband and you feel like you have been blindsided by something and you're not sure what it is. Your wife has changed emotionally in unpredictable ways. You are correct to be concerned that her situation might become more unpredictable and she could do things that may be hard to reverse in her life.

And this is actually the key to my answer to you that you need to consider and think about. That you love your wife is the first and most important tool we have. But it is only a tool. We have to find some way to use it. Why?

Because one of two things is most likely happening to your wife. You are correct that one of them may be the onset of Bipolar Disorder (BD). Why now?

The number one cause on the radar screen is actually the second likely thing that your wife might be undergoing. She may be having a major morbidity reaction to the miscarriage. A study about 4 years ago found that 50% of women who miscarry have some serious problem requiring treatment. Most often it is an anxiety or major depressive disorder and grief.

So it is possible that this is the problem. Or it is possible that the grief and shock and attendant psychological morbidity of the miscarriage triggered the onset of BD. BD in adults is very often triggered by some event that is psychologically devastating and anxiety provoking. So what to do?

If at all possible, I want you to print out my answer and take it with her to a Starbucks or other quiet place and discuss it. She is an adult and she has to make her own decisions. You can only pray for her.

So, present these possibilities that I am putting forth. Depending on where she is in her processing of the miscarriage, she will be either willing to consider that she needs help or not. And that the help is in two areas: psychological and spiritual. She cannot deny either one. To deny that she needs psychological help will make the spiritual attempt that she is struggling with to understand her life and what she wants unworthy of an answer. Why?

Because she will not be healthy enough to understand G-d's answers clearly. So, you must propose to her this opportunity to get help and then ask her to talk and you listen.

I wish you the very best!

Please remember to click the green accept button. Feel free to continue the discussion; my goal is to get you the best answers possible. Bonuses are always appreciated! If I can be of further help with any issue, just put "for Dr. Mark" in the front of your new question, and I'll be the one to answer it. All the best, XXXXX XXXXX

Dr. Mark, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5220
Experience: Dr. Mark is a PhD in psychology in private practice
Dr. Mark and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you

JustAnswer in the News:

Ask-a-doc Web sites: If you've got a quick question, you can try to get an answer from sites that say they have various specialists on hand to give quick answers... seen a spike since October in legal questions from readers about layoffs, unemployment and severance.
Web sites like
...leave nothing to chance.
Traffic on JustAnswer rose 14 percent...and had nearly 400,000 page views in 30 days...inquiries related to stress, high blood pressure, drinking and heart pain jumped 33 percent.
Tory Johnson, GMA Workplace Contributor, discusses work-from-home jobs, such as JustAnswer in which verified Experts answer people’s questions.
I will tell you that...the things you have to go through to be an Expert are quite rigorous.

What Customers are Saying:

  • I can go as far as to say it could have resulted in saving my sons life and our entire family now knows what bipolar is and how to assist and understand my most wonderful son, brother and friend to all who loves him dearly. Thank you very much Corrie Moll Pretoria, South Africa
< Previous | Next >
  • I can go as far as to say it could have resulted in saving my sons life and our entire family now knows what bipolar is and how to assist and understand my most wonderful son, brother and friend to all who loves him dearly. Thank you very much Corrie Moll Pretoria, South Africa
  • I thank-you so much! It really helped to have this information and confirmation. We will watch her carefully and get her in for the examination and US right away if things do not improve. God bless you as well! Claudia Albuquerque, NM
  • Outstanding response time less than 6 minutes. Answered the question professionally and with a great deal of compassion. Kevin Beaverton, OR
  • Suggested diagnosis was what I hoped and will take this info to my doctor's appointment next week.
    I feel better already! Thank you.
    Elanor Tracy, CA
  • Thank you to the Physician who answered my question today. The answer was far more informative than what I got from the Physicians I saw in person for my problem. Julie Lockesburg, AR
  • You have been more help than you know. I seriously don't know what my sisters situation would be today if you had not gone above and beyond just answering my questions. John and Stefanie Tucson, AZ
  • I have been dealing with an extremely serious health crisis for over three years, and one your physicians asked me more questions, gave me more answers and encouragement than a dozen different doctors who have been treating me!! Janet V Phoenix, AZ

Meet The Experts:

  • Dr. Keane

    Dr. Keane


    Satisfied Customers:

    Clinical Psychology PhD, Licensed Professional Counselor with experience in marriage/family, teens and child psychology.
< Last | Next >
  • Dr. Keane's Avatar

    Dr. Keane


    Satisfied Customers:

    Clinical Psychology PhD, Licensed Professional Counselor with experience in marriage/family, teens and child psychology.
  • Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC's Avatar

    Kate McCoy, M.Ed, NBCC, LPC


    Satisfied Customers:

    Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
  • Dr. Olsen's Avatar

    Dr. Olsen


    Satisfied Customers:

    PsyD Psychologist
  • Norman M.'s Avatar

    Norman M.

    Principal psychotherapist in private practice. Newspaper contributor, over 2000 satisfied clients on JA

    Satisfied Customers:

    ADHP(NC), DEHP(NC), ECP, UKCP Registered.
  • Dr. Michael's Avatar

    Dr. Michael


    Satisfied Customers:

    Licensed Ph.D. Clinical Health Psychology with 30 years of experience in private practive and as a clinical psychology university professor.
  • Rafael M.T.Therapist's Avatar

    Rafael M.T.Therapist


    Satisfied Customers:

    MHT-MHRS-MS-MA Integral Psychotherapist & Life Coach
  • Steven Olsen's Avatar

    Steven Olsen


    Satisfied Customers:

    More than twenty years of expertise in counseling, psychological diagnosis and education

Related Mental Health Questions