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Hi! I believe I can be of help with this issue. First, let me say I can imagine how confusing and distressing this situation must be for you. On the one hand your son was on a normal life path till he was about 14 years old. But on the other hand that is now almost two years ago and he hasn't stabilized back to a normal life path. And this is actually the key to my answer to you that you need to consider and think about. You are clearly a loving and caring parent. And this is very hard on you and you are trying to be encouraging and positive in helping him find that positive life path again. I am impressed with the efforts you have made. And it gives us very important information. What do I mean?
It is possible that your son is manifesting ONLY an internet gaming addiction. This is a new field in psychology and we are taking it seriously.
But my sense is that you need to have your son evaluated more comprehensively. He needs a full psychological evaluation to check for Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, for Asperger Syndrome, for depression, as well as for internet gaming addiction.
You are in Australia and so you may want to start with the national health service but you may need to seek an expert in evaluating teens and/or treating teens in the private pay sphere. I don't know your capabilities. But either way, please take action on this to have your son evaluated and treated. Because your efforts are valiant but he needs professional intervention very urgently.
I wish you the very best!
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Thank you for your responce, I suspect after seeking medical advice that he has some anxiety disorder as he has manifested physical symptoms like migraines with no apparant medical causes. he has become increasingly isolated and has some nervous twitches. He also has low self esteem. His grandmother passed away just before christmas and I think this made the situation worse.What doestn help is that he is a very big 6"4 boy who ways 95kg and looks like a man, but is very emotionaly immature. I have been nursing my mother prior to her death and also gone through a very difficult divorce, although not from his biological father. so there are many stressors in such a young life.