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Hi, I'd like to help you with your question.
Being lonely and difficulty with being attracted to unavailable women sounds more like an issue with relationships and how you see the opposite sex rather than bipolar disorder symptoms. Irritability can be attributed to bipolar, but it also can be a symptom of many other problems. The memory issues can also be explained by many different diagnosis.
You sound like you are getting plenty of sleep so unless you feel you are still tired or feel you need more sleep after you wake, you are getting the right amount of rest. Sleep apnea can cause you to feel tired and lethargic even if you do sleep during the night. You may want to explore getting a sleep study done through your regular doctor.
I think it is a good idea that you consider getting an evaluation done just to be sure that you do not need treatment. You have gone a long time without treatment and medications and appear to be functioning very well; the personal issues regarding relationships being what you feel to be your major issue. If you do indeed have Bipolar, then you must have a very mild version or you only have a few symptoms and not enough for a full blown diagnosis. Consider asking your doctor for a referral and at least getting an evaluation to determine what is going on, if anything.
I hope this has helped you,Kate