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Dr. Olsen
Dr. Olsen, Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 2336
Experience:  PsyD Psychologist
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My 14 year old grandson (whom Im raising) was caught masterbating

Customer Question

My 14 year old grandson (whom I'm raising) was caught masterbating in the common hallway by my niece. I don't know what to do. I know it's normal to masterbate but this was almost in public. Should I get him help?
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Dr. Olsen replied 6 years ago.
Hi, Welcome to JA. I am sorry to hear about your grandson's situation. Let me ask you a question before I offer an answer. Have you talked to him about this?
Customer: replied 6 years ago.
<p>No his cousin is going to. He doesn't know yet that she saw him. </p><p>How long does it take to get an answer?????</p>
Expert:  Dr. Olsen replied 6 years ago.
Hi, Thanks for your response. Is his cousin adult? If so, his cousin or you may need to remind him of the rule of touching his private part: he is not supposed to touch his private part in public.
If he has trouble managing his impulse or urge to masturbate anywhere including in the public place, he may have impulse control problems. I also wonder if he has symptoms of mood disorder like anxiety and depression and/or ADD/ADHD. He may try to control his feelings of anxiety and/or depression by masturbating.
If that is the case, he may need to see a child psychologist for psychological evaluation and/or testing to detect and rule out mood disorder and ADD/ADHD. If he has impulse control disorder, mood disorder and/or ADD/ADHD, he may need psychotherapy weekly.
I hope your grandson gets well.

Please let me know if you have more questions or I have overlooked any. P.S. Please remember to click the green accept button. Feel free to continue the discussion even after you press the accept button; my goal is to get you the best answers possible. Warm regards,
Dr. Olsen and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 6 years ago.

He has seen therapist in his past and I think they would have detected ADD/ADHD. The therapy was because his mother wasn't in his life much and his father has never been in his life. My niece is an adult - 29. What should she say to him?

Expert:  Dr. Olsen replied 6 years ago.
Hi, Thanks for your response. Okay. So, it sounds like he has impulse control issues. His cousin and/or you may need to tell him the rule of touching his private part - he is not supposed to touch his private part in public. He can touch it and masturbate in his room.
Customer: replied 6 years ago.

Thanks. Is it better that he thinks I don't know about this? I don't want to scar him for life. although I think if he's really embarssed he won't ever do it again.

Expert:  Dr. Olsen replied 6 years ago.
Hi there, Thanks for your response. You may give him another chance; his cousin talks to him about this. You may talk to him if he is found masturbating in the public again.
Customer: replied 6 years ago.


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