Hi, I'd like to help you with your question.
That is an interesting assignment your counselor gave you and an important one. Though it has no easy answers, I believe I can help you start your search.
Begin by taking a look at what life means to you. In other words, what meaning do you assign to your life everyday? When you wake up in the morning, why do you get up and start your day? What motivates you?
You can also use your senses. What smells good to you. What are your favorite scents? What food do you find appealing? What sounds make you feel relaxed? Which ones irritate you?
Look at your interests. Do you like to read? What are your favorite authors or types of books. Why are they your favorite? Do you like water or are you more of a mountain type person? What hobbies do you enjoy?
What makes you laugh? Cry? Become upset? Angry?
Do you like crowds or are you more introverted (liking to be alone more)?
By asking yourself these questions, you can get a better picture of who you are. You need to reinforce these findings so you start to understand yourself better and learn what pleases you and what things get you mad. By understanding your world better, you learn more control over it and need to rely less on others to define you.
I hope this has helped you,Kate