Seeking expert counseling is a sign of strength. A personal relationship with a caring professional is proven clinically effective.
Thank you for not giving up hope. As a Christian, you are certainly not considering suicide, but only praying for deliverance. You can be delivered from your depression and have a more joyful life.
The meds and therapy are obviously not enough to quell your depression. There are remedies and alternatives for resistant depression.
Medication is not always the answer to depression, although some depressions do not respond to normal medications.
I imagine that you may have a chemical imbalance that the doctor is trying to correct. Various forms of psychotherapy work for many, but perhaps you have tried this route. If not, it is something to consider.
not mention which medications you are taking, but I assume that they are one of the widely dispensed SSRIs such as Prozac or Zoloft or Paxil, or others. There are also
drugs of the MAOI class on your list. (Monoamine Oxide Inhibitors). Such drugs would include Parnate and Naril, and they are often prescribed as a last resort because they can have dangerous side effects and cannot be mixed with certain foods (aged cheeses, pickles, wine) and some other medications, such as some decongestants.
A newer, very promising MAOI is worn as a skin patch and has fewer side effects; it is called selegiline (Emsam).
Electroconvulsive therapy passes electrical currents (small) through the brain, affectivng neurotransmitter levels. It usually offers immediate relief of severe depression and is used on individuals who don't respond to medications, and also to those who cannot take the strong effects of the medications, such as pregnant women and the elderly.
Another option is the implantation of a micro-pulse generator that stimulates the vegus nerve to affect the brain's mood centers. This is another way of treating chronic depression that is resistant to treatment.
Finally, there is Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation, using electomagnets held against your upper forehead to produce an electric current in your brain for the purpose of affecting those same mood centers.
You have an array of options to consider and balance the costs in your money, time, and other considerations, against the history of failed drug treatment. Compared to life, of course, money is nothing.
I sincerely hope I have been of assistance to you. If you need further clarification, I am here for you. If this is enough information to get you motivated and give you some hopeful options, then I wish you the very best.
Elliott Sewell, LPCC, NCC