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Dr. Keane
Dr. Keane, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1371
Experience:  Clinical Psychology PhD, Licensed Professional Counselor with experience in marriage/family, teens and child psychology.
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what do you do when your 41 yr old daughter needs immediate

Customer Question

what do you do when your 41 yr old daughter needs immediate therapy cause she is destroying her life but won't recognize it
she has had 3 dui in 5 years, lost every job and can't hold on to relationships...and I offered help but she says she is not ready????
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Dr. Olsen replied 5 years ago.
Hi, Welcome to JA. I am sorry to hear about your daughter's situation. Let me ask you a few questions before I offer an answer. When did this start? Has she been under stress?
Customer: replied 5 years ago.

Its been going on for years...slowly escalating...she is a procrastinator...and everything is put on the back burner...but never gets we have a court hearing on the 22 of March on her third DUI and I told her she needs therapy...cause her binge drinking is a product of an underlying bigger problem...and she agrees but will not commit on going in until she resolves some issues??? these issues are never resolved so its a never ending problem....I don't think stress is a problem at all. the problem now is that the court will most likely require in house treatment for at least 30 days and it can be a court appointed facility where she gets put in with other inmates or a private place that I have to pay for...and I was willing to pay for it but I don't see that it will help unless she actually sees that she needs help, otherwise she will just go and not really cooperate...just to swap it for jail...

she lives on cloud 9...she was working for me but I told her I was not enabling her in any way until she realizes she needs help. I was picking her up and bringing her to work and home at 5...and she still thinks she can get a license, no car?????

Expert:  Dr. Olsen replied 5 years ago.
Hi, Thanks for your response. I will be back with my answer tomorrow.
Customer: replied 5 years ago.
Relist: No answer yet.
i never received an answer therefor pls do not charge 22.00 to my account
Expert:  Dr. Olsen replied 5 years ago.
Hi, Thanks for waiting.
Let me say I can imagine how worried and anxious you must have been about your daughter’s condition.

It sounds like she has signs of anxiety and/or depression. She may also have alcohol abuse issues.

Yes, she needs treatment from her doctor, a psychiatrist, a psychotherapist, and/or alcohol counselor.

She may benefit from having a Cognitive-Behavior therapy (CBT). CBT is a most effective therapy for anxiety and depression. CBT consists of Self-Monitoring, Relaxation strategies, Exposure treatments, Cognitive therapy. There are several ways to find a psychologist or psychotherapist who takes your insurance.
You can call your insurance company and get a list of providers in your area. Or, you can search a licensed psychotherapist on internet- such as the PSYCHOLOGY TODAY website. Go to ( and enter your zip code and optional category of specialty such as anxiety. Read psychotherapists’ profile to see if he or she specializes in Cognitive-behavior therapy and anxiety. You may also want to create your mental image of psychotherapist that she wants to work with – Male or female? Old or young? To note, many therapists offer initial consultation for free. So you can see it as an informational meeting. You can ask any question. You can also negotiate psychotherapy fee and number of sessions.

If she has no health insurance, you can also call The United Way toll free # 211 to find the community mental health centers in your area where she can get treatment described above even without health insurance. She can get counseling for free or low fee.

You may also check the link from ANXIETY DISORDERS ASSOCIATION OF AMERICA( for resources. You may also find a specialist in your area from the link - ( You may encourage her to try some or all of the following to reduce anxiety and improve her mood - 1. Exercise moderately, but regularly, 2. Eat healthy but delicious meals, 3. Regularize your sleep cycle, 4. Don't drink to excess or abuse drugs, 5. Spend some time every day in play, 6. Develop recreational outlets that encourage creativity, 7. Distance yourself from destructive situations or people, 8. Practice mindfulness meditation, or walk, or an intimate talk, every day, 9. Allow yourself to feel pride in your accomplishments, 10, Listen to compliments and expression of affection, 11. Build and use a support system, 12. Pay more attention to small pleasures and sensations, 13. Yoga, meditation, Acupuncture, Guided imagery, and massage therapy may help. Additionally, Biofeedback may work for anxiety. Biofeedback is a self-control technique since it involves having a client to learn to modify his or her own behaviors and is based, like many other self-control procedures, on the principle of operant conditioning. The biofeedback may work for anxiety, depression and physical pain. Please contact - The association for Psychophysiology and Biofeedback ( for resources and to find a provider in your area. I hope she gets well. Please let me know if you have more questions or I have overlooked any. Warm regards,

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