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Elliott, LPCC, NCC
Elliott, LPCC, NCC, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 7664
Experience:  35 years of experience as a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, National Certified Counselor and a college professor.
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Should my daughter see a counselor, or is it none of my business She is an almost 21

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Should my daughter see a counselor, or is it none of my business? She is an almost 21 year-old college junior. She works very hard and hardly ever leaves her dorm. She has a new roommate every year, but seems to get along with them with no problems so far. I just wonder why she hasn't kept her friends from high school or made new college friends. When she comes home she has a great time with her older brother and younger sister. She has a close relationship with her older sister who lives away from home. She has lots of cousins and loves to be with them at the lake in the summer. She is a very happy girl but I wonder if she should talk to someone about not having any friends. She recently joined the chorus at her college. Thanks. Added later:  I just read over what I wrote and can't believe I typed "older brother." He is 17 and a junior in high school. I must think of her as younger than him. All 3 of her siblings are very social and have lots of friends. She has always been shy and happy to spend time by herself. I know she has tried to make friends when working on projects for different classes, but when the classes were over they acted like they didn't know her when she saw them. I know that hurt her because we talked about it. I think it makes her put up walls.

Elliott Sewell, LPCC, NCC :

Seeking expert counseling is a sign of strength. A personal relationship with a caring professional is proven clinically effective.

Dear friend,

I have switched from "chat" mode to Q & A mode. Expect my answer to follow in a few minutes. Just give it a little time and it will be forthcoming. I am going to start to work on it NOW.


Elliott Sewell, LPCC, NCC
Dear friend,

A person has a mental disorder when they are disfunctional. Your daughter seems to be very functional. She is a bit shy and reclusivie, but most of all is a serious student, the kind that is becoming a rarer phenemenon, and also the kind that succeeds in life.

She has grown past her high school friends, which shows that she is not stuck in the past. She is focused on her work, gets along with her roomates, and has a good relationship with her siblings and family members. She even joined the chorus.

She does not have a problem. She shows no symptoms of any personality disorders or mental health problems. She is just a serious student focused on her work. Just love her and support her as she is.

I strongly urge you to accept her completely and don't cause social distance by suggesting she needs to see a counselor, because in my professional estimation she is a normal and highly functional person.

I wish you and your family great blessings.

Elliott Sewell, LPCC, NCC
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