Hi, I'd like to help you with your question.
I am sorry to hear about all that you have been through.
Have you thought about changing psychiatrists? It sounds like your current Dr. is not helping you. You may want to find a psychiatrist that specializes in Dissociative disorders so if you do have this diagnosis, you will be correctly treated for it. Here is a link to help you locate a doctor in your area: http://doctor.webmd.com/physician_finder/whandler.aspx?sponsor=core&cosponsor=webmd&sdd=Psychiatrists&sr=94&loc=Enter+Location&x=24&y=9
Here is another resource that has great tips on how to find a good psychiatrist: http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2010/02/02/how-do-i-find-a-good-psychiatrist/.
You may also want to change therapists as well. Here is another link to help you find a therapist in your area: http://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/.
Although dissociative disorder is rare, in cases of extreme abuse it can occur. Treatment can help and reintegration of personalities can be achieved with the help of an experienced therapist.
It also sounds as if you and your spouse could benefit from marital therapy. Talk with your new therapist about a referral or check with your regular doctor. If you attend church, you can also talk with your pastor. With all you have been through already, having your husband's support is important. Therapy can help you both to work on coming together instead of growing apart.
Memory problems are also very common when someone has experienced child abuse. It is a defense mechanism that the brain uses when the abuse is too much for the child to handle mentally and emotionally. Although this may be part of your dissociative disorder if you have one, it can also just be a natural defense mechanism that you developed to protect yourself. Your therapist can help you explore this further.
I hope this has helped you,