Hi, I'd like to help you with your question.
It sounds like it could be one of two things. Either one, he is telling you the truth and he is dealing with a mental illness that affects him and the relationship, or two he wants to break the relationship off and isn't being truthful as to why.
Since he is out of town, it would be very difficult for you to see a counselor with him to work the relationship issues out. However, if you feel you want to see one yourself, it would give you an opportunity to work out how you feel about what has happened here.
Do you feel you want to continue the relationship? If you do, you can go to see him and talk about how to work this out. Depending on what he says, you may be able to fix the situation. Let him know you are working on your issues and want to try to continue the relationship. It depends a lot on what he choses to do as to whether or not this will work.
He is not giving you much to work with in repairing whatever problem he is having. The answers he gave are vague and so therefore there is not much to focus on. If you can, when you contact him, let him know you want him to be honest. He may not react well to this, but it is worth a try. He has given you little else to go on.
I hope this helped you,Kate
It sounds like is either unsure what he wants or he is not being truthful. It is hard to say without seeing him face to face but he is not being open about what is going on.
If letting him be worked last time, you may want to try it again. If he is willing to repair things again this time, I would highly recommend you see a therapist to figure out why he keeps acting like this toward you. You need to know what he is dealing with so you can have a better idea of how to react in the relationship.
I understand. It sounds like from what you said that he likes when you push to have contact.
It is difficult without knowing his feelings about this situation to know what would work when talking with him. Most likely, being neutral is your best bet. Talk with him, let him know you are interested in the relationship and that you'd like to work things out. Depending on what he says, you can respond how you feel would work best. It sounds like there are other motives to what he says and does. If you feel pushing would help, then do that. If not, back off. If you feel going to see him works best, XXXXX XXXXX to go. You may be able to work this out better seeing him in person.
I am guessing based on the information you are giving me. It is difficult to know what he motivations are with how he is treating you. You are trying to guess the right things to say or do with him without knowing why he is distancing himself from you then getting back together with you. This makes it nearly impossible to understand him.
There is no specific strategies to use with a person to make them do what you want or react how you want. You want him to be with you, but he is not acting like a person who understands what it takes to be in a good solid relationship. That is why counseling is so important. You are not going to be able to understand if he is being honest or not unless you understand his motivation and he won't let you do that.
I am going to opt out to let other experts have a chance to help you.
I am sure you will
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