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Ask Dr. Rossi Your Own Question
Dr. Rossi
Dr. Rossi, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 4627
Experience:  PsyD, LPC, CHt
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blended family husband and daughter dont get along. Is it time

Customer Question

blended family husband and daughter dont get along. Is it time to move on after 17 years together?
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Dr. Rossi replied 5 years ago.



Moving on or not would depend on different factors. Can you provide a bit more info 1/ what discord is there between the two of them, 2/ how does your accident play a role in this, 3/ what does he say about the situation, 4/ how long have you been asking yourself this question- about moving on?

Customer: replied 5 years ago.

My daughter doesn't want him telling her what to do. She is 19 years old. He picks out the negative never gives positive feed back. This has been going on for years!


My accident made me realize that life is precious. I feel I have a chance to make things right. I put this child on this earth and she should be happy.


My husband wants to go to therapy again. He says he loves me. But how will he be happy if he doesn't get along with my daughter.


Should I move on has been in question for a long time. Off and on for years.

Expert:  Dr. Rossi replied 5 years ago.

Thank you for clarifying.

If she is 19 and an adult now, both of them would have to compromise in order not to have a discord. They do not necessarily have to be crazy about each other but do have to be civil. If you believe that both of them can be civil and remain this way hence forth, then it is understandable to give the relationship a chance.


If on the other hand for 10 years you've tried and nothing much had improved, it is time to move on.

If you believe that your husband loves you and can work on himself, you can give him a chance. After all, your daughter is an adult and you need not only her love but that of your husband, unless you want to be single or connect with someone else in the future. You've raised your daughter, had taken care of her and provided for her. You too are entitled to your life.

Customer: replied 5 years ago.

My daughter is not willing to compromise at this point. I don't blame her for this she has been mistreated for years. By age she is legally an adult but I believe she still needs parenting because of all the dirty looks and negative remarks that have been given to her.


I feel like my daughter will always need me. she needs to know that she has someone to turn to in her times of need. I don't want to be punished in the future if he can't accept her.


I have raised my daughter,however I feel I should have done better for her. Chose my husband over her every other time. Doesn't she deserve her chance?



Expert:  Dr. Rossi replied 5 years ago.
Everyone in this case deserves a chance- you, him, and your daughter. Depending on the severity/nature of mistreatment you're referring to, past behavior predicts future behavior. If he had not made any improvement all of this time, then you move on.

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