thanks for your reply. Im not really in agreement with your reply and wondered if it could be possible he is actually quite childlike and needy wanting to talk about himself first? I believe he may have a personality disorder but he is very sociable with his own friends, yet makes me feel uncomfortable (and often yawns) when I have been out wiht my own friends (which is not often for that reason). I dont believe he uses me for sexual enjoyment as we are both willing partners. Sex doesnt necessarily make me feel loved. I cant really agree that he casts me aside like rubbish when he doesnt want me. He openly said that he found it hard being in contact wtih me after being so close particulary after I wanted to just be friends when we last broke up. I think his main problem is that he sees everything as critisism when in fact I just want to talk about our problems and find a solution. If I start talking about this he becomes aggressive and says Im being selfish and everything I do needs to be on a list with rules.Do you think that just having time apart from him without any contact on my part may help him realise that his aggresive behaviour is actually the cause of our problems. I can never speak long enough to him to explain anything as he just pushes things back to me and accuses me of pushing things back to him which he wont accept.