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Carol Kryder LMFT
Carol Kryder LMFT, Mental Health Professional
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 808
Experience:  APA Board Certified, Diplomate,Substance Abuse Professional, 20 years family therapy experience
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My ex lied a lot about irrelevent things. Embarrassing like

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My ex lied a lot about irrelevent things. Embarrassing like we just returned from a vacation which never happened. Or when you mention some thing you have learned or explored, he has already been there. It got pretty weird. I asked for help from a Psychologist who said that if I said anything directly to him he could crack up. I tried indirectly but basically for than and other reasons - mostly his depression, I had to leave.   Now our daughter is 26 and I notice she lies the same way. I don't know what to do. I don't say much when I hear the lies but I am deeply concerned. She has Adhd and also drinks too much right now.    Can you point me in ways that can help her?<br /><br />ADDED:   not sure what to do.  I have submitted, done passwords, created a username and so far can't figure out what on earth to do or expect.

Carol Kryder LMFT :

Hello and Welcome to JustAnswer. Your question is not closed until you are satisfied. I am happy to assist you with your question.

Carol Kryder LMFT :

I am sorry to tell you that there is not much you can do for either your husband or your daughter. Since you asked about her, the first problem to be addressed is her drinking. She may have learned the lying behavior from her father and when she drinks, since it lowers inhibitions, she just spins tall tales because that is what Dad did. It sounds like he built an entire persona around these lies, which is why the psychologist told you not to confront him. For your daughter it is probably a different issue, and you can confront her, but I would talk to her about the drinking first.

Carol Kryder LMFT :

If she will not accept that she has a drinking problem, you have no leverage. She is a grown woman and you will need to allow her to accept the consequences of her behavior. I strongly suggest Alanon for support and good information on how to deal with her. It is free and they have meetings every day of the week.

Carol Kryder LMFT :

Do you have further questions about anything I have said?

Carol Kryder LMFT :

P.S. Daniel Amen is a very good resource, and I like his work, but the drinking is primary here. It needs to be addressed first.

Customer :

HI I will accept but was looking for something more..."modern" for example how to understand the lying. The brain patterns that lead to addictions. And ways to help with that. You know the inherited etchings in our brains.

Customer :

Thank you so much.

Customer :

Sincerely

Customer :

Customer

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