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TherapistMarryAnn, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 5763
Experience:  Over 20 years experience specializing in anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol, and relationship issues.
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My mother is an enabler in my Sisters addiction to drugs, she isnt buying

Resolved Question:

My mother is an enabler in my Sister's addiction to drugs, she isn't buying her the drugs, but enables her in every other way. What tools can I use to get her to stop enabling my sister ? I'm worried my sister will die if she doesn't get help.
Submitted: 5 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  TherapistMarryAnn replied 5 years ago.

Hi, I'd like to help you with your question.


It sounds as if you really have good insight into the situation with your family. I understand it is difficult to stand by and to not only see the situation clearly, but not be able to have any control over the situation.


Although your mother may not yet understand the damage she is doing by enabling your sister, you can start the process of healing by helping yourself. Once she sees what you are doing, she may follow suit. Also, by helping yourself gain a better understanding of the family dynamics and effects of drug abuse, you can be better equipped to deal with your mother and your sister.


If you have not tried this already, I highly recommend Al Non. You can find them on the web at They can provide support for you in talking with your mother and give you ideas on what might work.


Also, these books may be helpful. One is called The Enabler by Angelyn Miller. Another is Facing Codependence: What It Is, Where It Comes from, How It Sabotages Our Lives by Pia Mellody, Andrea Wells Miller, and J. XXXXX XXXXX. These are available on or your local library may have them.


I hope this helped you,


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