OK GUYS, I HAVE PAID FOR UNLIMITED QUESTIONS AND WE ARE GOING ON DAY THREE HERE, I AM REALLY BEGINNING TO BELIEVE THE NASTY REPORTS ABOUT THE JUST ANSWER SCAM JOB. AND DO NOT EVEN THINK OF CHARGING ME AGAIN. I AM PISSED. SO SO PISSED.this is hard for me to write, because i like my nurse practitioner, but i have suffered so much this year. i was on 120 mg of adderrall xr. fine, then i got some kind of dermatitis, and I was apparently misdiagnosed with "crusted" or norwegian scabies. because i am a professor, i, of course researched this to the hilt...and little did
i know that the symptoms are oft confused with seb dermatitis which i what i really have. however, i suffered...i really suffered when i believed this dx. nights when i could not sleep, my dog and I sitting on my zen bed (slats only because i was so fearful i threw the mattress over my deck). I cleaned and cleaned and cleaned until i dropped from exhaustion. To this day, since i am off the xr and only on the short acting that I always said worked well for me but my doc would not give that kind to me, well, i am fine. But i am not, because i am seeing how utterly insane i was. i swore I saw them, and i did indeed have cellulitus at the time so it was very scary....i couldn't walk anywhere. I was in a state of hypervigilance all the time. it was the most horrifying experience of my life. i went through it alone. i did see an infectious disease specialist who told me i was crazy, crazy for what? believing my doctor and doing research? then i was sent to a dermatologist who promptly threw me out of his office and said i was delusional. i asked, over and over and over, "if not this, what is it???" i spent the summer losing my hair, suffering from rashes, and my own children have abandoned me because i was afraid to go anywhere. Now i am feeling normal...but with that comes great pain, and many tears, and the realization that i was probably a freakin nut case. I have a Ph.D in clinical psych. and I was a tenured prof for 16 years. But that does not help when one must make a decision when one is impaired. I am suffering from so much anger, anger at i dont know who, anger at the nurse who did not take even my suicide attempt seriously (i dont think i was crazy, just horribly bereft and impulsive and i did not ever use the valium they gave me (guess I should have) ...." i am so down. so alone. so misunderstood. so angry. and because of this dx of delusional psychosis
(a temporary thing due to the adderall) i cannot get help really. this is a small community, word gets around. i am not getting help for severe sinusitus and other issues. i do have a derm who has confirmed the rash and hair breakage is due to seb. derm. but my god, how much do i have to go through until anyone takes me seriously again. i am so hurt. i feel labeled. i did not do this to myself. i listened to my doctors. i am angry. i lost my family. i never see my five grandchildren. sometimes the grief is unbearable. i dont know what to do.