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Hi, I have seen that site before and read a lot about Borderline although it looks like you really do need a trained professional to diagnose it. It is quite complicated. I think I have a lot of those traits myself especially as I have been diagnosed Bipolar II. It dont like accepting it but I'm on treatment and that makes life a lot more regular. With the things I have presented to people on this site and other Psych professionals the answers always indicates Bordeline. My view is that she doesnt have the chronic emptiness and the outbursts of anger that seems to characterise it. She does seem to idealize me a little but I'm not sure about being devalued. I believe I do know a Bordeline lady or two and its the anger/rage behaviour that seems to detemine them as that. I have had revolting and painful abuse on emails but I got hard on her about that and I havent had them again. So that was devaluing. She reckons its just her Italian nature. I suppose the, 'how could you be so cruel' routine is inevitable. Anna from this site said that psychologists know when they are talking to BPD because they make you feel insane. I think if I just be with her some more she would be settled down and be good company. but I keep running away because I simply feel insane. I cant overcome my need to reason with her, and to help her, because can be really nice. I dont think there is any help possible about this. Its all up to me. All I know is I've been going around this mountain looking for help. I dont feel I can get out because I dont think I've got it in me to be cruel to her. I'm not sure Ive got the question right. The science of it isnt helping. So heres the question. Is it love when someone suddenly turns around from sweet talk to angry questioning in 0.05 seconds, or is it emotional blackmail that most people dont do. I have never treated anyone I love like that. I'll leave it with you.