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Of course it is not too late. Your son will stop acting out when you have settled down yourself. You need to make his environment as predictable as possible and right now it may not be possible, but you need to start working toward that for him. Please get as much support for yourself as you can. As I said, when you have settled your life down your son will follow suit. Do not feel guilty, because you have not screwed him up.
I urge you to get into therapy and get some support. Possibly you can join a support group of other parents who have children with special needs. Do you have any specific questions about this?
I guess I fear that I may not have been there for him as much as I should have and that has effected him in how he thinks of himself. Is there anything I can do to help reassure him and give him self confidence. As far as the special needs support groups it is not something I've looked into..and just don't know if I can make the time for it. Seth is much better off then a lot of special needs children and has potential of catching up completely and living a normal healthy life. We believe that he will with a lot of hard work and patience.
Good. You are doing better than you think you are, you are just overwhelmed right now. Try to spend some alone time with the four year old every day. Even 10 minutes will do it. Be sure to tell him how much you love him and show him how precious he is to you by your actions. Encourage him to take risks and try new things and praise him for trying, while still letting him know that we all make mistakes and mistakes are just opportunities for learning something new.
You can do this!!!!
Best to you