Hello and Welcome to JustAnswer. Your question is not closed until you are satisfied. I am happy to assist you with your question.
You may not wish to hear this answer, but you need to see a doctor and get on some medication. You will cause yourself and your parents much more sorrow and anguish if you don't. Please do this. Your symptoms and family history are alarming, and it is certainly possible that you may have bipolar disorder.
Don't let your fear stop you. Just let the fear come and do it anyway. Go to the nearest emergency room if you feel suicidal again. Please let me know if I can help further.
I care about your welfare and you really need to reach out and accept help.
Best to you