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mindhealer
mindhealer, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 693
Experience:  Licensed in MD and am also a Board Certified Diplomate (Advanced Practioner) I have over 10 years experience
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Hi I am a recovered alcoholic (although I try not to let it

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Hi I am a recovered alcoholic (although I try not to let it define me) and have stopped drinking for over 2 years now. For 2 years I was in comfort zone of loneliness telling myself that I had to be alone because this was the price I had to pay to get sober.
I met a girl at the end of October and despite not feeling any serious triggers to start before that, she made me feel like I wanted to drink again, I felt like I was in love despite only knowing her for a day. I know that this was unnatural and actually I was feeling infatuation because I had not been interested in a girl for such a long time.
It troubled me that I could not behave rationally in this respect and now realise that I had closed myself off to women. Needless to say it did not work out with the girl and she did not turn out to be all that.
I am sorry to have given you my life story but ultimately I feel that what caused me act like that, to still be single and ultimately what caused me to drink in the first place is being sexually repressed. So ultimately what I would like to know is how do I stop being this way and open up?

mindhealer :

Good evening. I am online and available to help. Let me know when you are back online and we can meet here in the chatroom.

JACUSTOMER-b5dpjfyz- :

hi

mindhealer :

hello

mindhealer :

First let me say Im so sorry you're having such a difficult time with this

mindhealer :

would you mind if I asked a couple questions to have a better understanding of what is happening?

JACUSTOMER-b5dpjfyz- :

yeah please do?

mindhealer :

you mentioned that it was sexual repression that caused you to drink to start with...can you tell me a little more about that please?

JACUSTOMER-b5dpjfyz- :

basically i incredibly shy when i am around new people and particular girls that i may feel an attraction to, i uased to combt this with alcohal that worked for some time but eventually just made it worse

mindhealer :

thank you.....that certainly helps to understand better

mindhealer :

it sounds like you used alcohol as a means of working up courage....does that sound accurate?

JACUSTOMER-b5dpjfyz- :

yeah that was it originally and then i found myself in a cycle

mindhealer :

It sounds like that cycle has actually built up an association between your emotions and your urge to drink

mindhealer :

may I ask...have you ever been through therapy?

JACUSTOMER-b5dpjfyz- :

i have never had regular therapy only once with the hospital

mindhealer :

ok.

mindhealer :

This association has never been worked through....your confidence is there...its just that you cant seem to draw on it and feel secure with yourself without the alcohol....despite being sober for 2 years now....which you should be very proud of mind you! :)

JACUSTOMER-b5dpjfyz- :

i am proud, so should i be lloking for therapy?

mindhealer :

Yes I believe so...

mindhealer :

I think once you work through the issue of confidence then you will feel a great deal more secure with yourself and be able to approach a woman with greater confidence

mindhealer :

Does that make sense?

JACUSTOMER-b5dpjfyz- :

yeah but is their a specific feild of therapy? i should be looking for?

mindhealer :

I would suggest meeting with a therapist who is trained in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy

mindhealer :

its a matter of identifying how your thoughts and emotions are interconnected and they impact one another

JACUSTOMER-b5dpjfyz- :

ok thank you for your help is their anything else i should do?

mindhealer :

I think this would be a good start for you. Honestly I believe you'll do well in therapy

mindhealer :

Do you have any other questions?

JACUSTOMER-b5dpjfyz- :

why do you think that?

mindhealer :

beause you seem very open and receptive to working through this issue

mindhealer :

it means that you are willing to do the work involved to get healthier

JACUSTOMER-b5dpjfyz- :

ok many thanks to you i have no more questions

mindhealer :

You are most welcome

mindhealer :

You can end the chat by clicking the Accept button if you feel Ive answered you thoroughly :)

JACUSTOMER-b5dpjfyz- :

ok godspeed

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