My own style of practice tends to be conservative, so medications may be an option...but I initially recommend other treatments, esp. for a 13 year old.
Most studies on severe social anxiety would show the best results with a combination of medications and psychotherapy.
On the one hand, I understand what the therapist said...but the therapy still needs to work to treat and alleviate the social anxiety. Keep in mind, psychotherapy takes time (I recommend weekly for 6-12 months a minimum trial).
I also recommend learning some formal relaxation therapy (yoga, tai chi, meditation,etc). All these treatments are proven by studies using sophisticated brain scans to calm down the brain.
I would definitely get her some good self help books like this one: The Shyness & Social Anxiety Workbook: Proven, Step-by-Step Techniques for Overcoming Your Fear by Martin M. Antony and Richard P. Swinson
Let me know if you need more details. Good luck.
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