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Karyn Jones
Karyn Jones, Mental Health Professional
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1716
Experience:  Diploma of Counselling and Transactional Analysis Counselling, Lifeline counselling, Pastoral Care.
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Our family has been devestated by sibling abuse. The kids are

Resolved Question:

Our family has been devestated by sibling abuse. The kids are in counseling, but I can't recover. There doesn't seem to be a therapist "category" that I fit into. It's been 1 1/2 years since disclosure, and I still feel that my life is forever broken.How can I find a therapist who can understand the person who is the parent of the perp AND the victim?
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Karyn Jones replied 3 years ago.
Hello, my name is XXXXX XXXXX for bringing your very real concerns to Just Answer..before, I continue on with my response please know just how truly sorry I am to hear of sibling abuse within your family...and I can well imagine the devastation/pain that goes with that..no easy road to go down by any means for you & your family.
But therapy for each person is seen differently and is really about finding a therapist or counsellor that you like, one that you can respond to and one who is caring/kind/supportive,understanding and most of all patient ..with you, someone ( male/female) that you can build up a trusting relationship with)..someone that understands what you are going through with regards XXXXX XXXXX own recovery from that of a traumatized parents point of view ...concerning that of your siblings involved..
A therapist/counsellor that begins to see how you think..about things/view the events and yourself in those events...
This as you can imagine is essential in your full recovery and is about 'connecting' with the 'right' one...and comes down to personal preference..and first impressions ( or your gut feelings 'instincts' if you like) ..no one can tell you to form that valuable trust/bond with your therapist because if its going to happen, it will naturally and no other way..your road to recovery is only going to be a good as the qualifications/skill of your counsellor or therapist outlined above...and if you can form a trusting bond with him/her..
and you will know if you can upon your first meeting..
As far as finding one who counsels parents of sibling abuse...all I can suggest by way of a starting point in the right direction is that of either your local Clinical counselling/therapist Phone Directory ...and or look up their websites (if at all possible) to gain as much information about each one as you can...and or contact your family Dr who could well have many on his/her books of whom he/she could write you a referral to see..
Another avenue for you to try would be to look under support agencies and local counselling agencies in your area..from your local newspaper..
Please also know that you are entitled to make an appointment to find out if you feel comfortable working with him/her ( in fact most therapists suggest this at the time of meeting..) you are not obligated to work with them if you don't feel you will get on,
.(because this is crucial )( some therapist won't charge for the initial consultation but please inquire when phoning, after -all this is of an extreme sensitive issue and needs extreme sensitive handling..so a good skilled therapist will help you to understand why the abuse even happened, why you are 'not' to blame for it ..and help free you from the effects of the past so you can enjoy a happier life in the future..
Your children are in counselling working with these issues and so ultimately this will bring about a great healing and working on this together.

I do hope this has been of help to you..if it has please 'accept' my response as it also helps to keep this valuable service going for you and others int he future..please know that my thoughts are' with you at this time...and will pray for you & your children's ultimate healing/restoration.
blessings
Karen. S (ProfClinical DipCounBmin)
Karyn Jones, Mental Health Professional
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1716
Experience: Diploma of Counselling and Transactional Analysis Counselling, Lifeline counselling, Pastoral Care.
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