Thanks Mina, I am so grateful for your answer. I have just landed back in Australia and was wondering if I am going to regret not being there for them until the end of my visa - another two weeks. I breathe a sigh a of relief for considerate and rational response with evidence as to what I suspected - some serious pathological issues to do with it. I will definately seek a good psychologist, this has gone on long enough!
So thats my short thank you. Really am grateful, because it was an occasion of trusting my gut feeling when my head told me to stay. I think I have demonstared to her faltmate what he needs to do and I will pass this reply on to him ( without names, and webiste etc.)