Hello, I have just run away from a patient. I am not a doctor, just a volunteer. I was there for a month in a motel next door to a chronic Lyme Disease patient and her flatmate. I drove her around, and paid for all the groceries and meals ( 90% of). I also paid for medicines and other aids, a stoll, light bulbs and a new laptop. I never agreed to enter a financial obligation to them as a volunteer. I read her passages about divine healing which she tried to believe before I got there. I paid for the flatmates car registration and other bits and pieces not to mention my accommodation next door. I felt increasingly frustrated when I realised the degree of emotional manipulation that was destroying the flatmate who has been stuck with her for two years at huge expense to his independance. It is infact a horrible codependant relationship. I started waking up at 2am in the mornings and busting to get on a plane and escape. One of her text messages managed to get me to leave the terminal after check in an return to them by an very indirect question, "did
you get a plane?". Somehow it manipulated me, always to the tune of her problem is worse than mine or the flatmates. He was very confsued between his need to be a caregiving servant and his need to go home, but seemed endlessly trapped by the manipulations. After a month I started to feel his same pain, her hooks were incredible. A cute 26 year old, pathetic victim of an insideous tick borne infection. Chronic fatigue, avoiding light, always in pain, sometimes happy and cheerful, but avoids direct objective communication about anything. It was spell binding. My conscience was concerned about her illegal status as on overstayer, surely the lowest priority but a a risk none the less to her landlord and flatmate as well. The local doctor gave me a notice to return home to see my doctor for an long time untreated condition of Bipolar
II and speculated ADHD. This notice was not taken seriously by either of them because they though I just needed love of thier own religious kind.(!) In the end this was not love, it was manipulation and extortion thinly disgiused by religioon, both theirs and mine because I thought it was a good thing to keep shedding my cash for them. The whole things started with no stated boundaries, no thought for objective matters of concern, ( e.g., where are her parants?) and ended up fighting for my sanity by fleeing at 2am to the airport. I want to know if I am a selfish bastard if I can put it that way, or if infact my conscience is dicating properly to me for appropriate behaviour. I felt suddenly hostile and thought it was not wise to communicate to either of them until I got home. She is too weak emotionally and I dont have a diplomatic posture when I am frustrated and hostile. The manipulative words woke me feeling crazy and almost breaking furniture on more then three occasions. Perhaps its my fault for over giving and my passive aggresive ways expecting something back ,like rational discussion, but I could never find it there. Thanks for your help.