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Gina P
Gina P, LCSW
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 175
Experience:  MSW, LCSW, PIP
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Hello. I am 23 weeks pregnant and am suffering from severe

Resolved Question:

Hello. I am 23 weeks pregnant and am suffering from severe anxiety. I am obsessing over things that I think I do that hurt the baby...even though she and I are healthy. Do you have any good tips on how to prepare myself for this baby?
Submitted: 3 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Gina P replied 3 years ago.

Gina P :

Hi, Thank you for using Just Answer.

Customer :

hi thank you for responding

Gina P :

If you are checking in with your physician ona regular basis, I am sure you are taking good care of yourself.

Gina P :

Of course.

Gina P :

I type a bit slow so please bear with me!

Customer :

yes i am ...monthly and everything is normal

Customer :

i feel like i am alone

Gina P :

One thing that might help to aleviate your stress and anxiety is to take a parenting class that can help you learn about healthy things you ARE doing, and to learn to care for your baby one he/she is here. Have you tried this yet?

Customer :

no. im planning to start birthing and parenting classes next month with my husband

Gina P :

Most hospitals offer this for a fee, or a local church organization

Customer :

i feel out of control bc i cant tell if shes okay. i just want her out so i iknow for sure

Gina P :

Birth class is good, but what I mean is a class that teaches you about the first year of life with an infant.

Customer :

im not worried about that,,,just getting through this pregnancy

Gina P :

"What to expect when you're expecting" is a really good book, by Murkoff. And the sequel to this continues into the first year of life.

Gina P :

The book gives you lots of practical information about pregnancy week by week and month to month.

Customer :

i tried it! i read it front to back but it just scared the hell out of me. Im one of those who thinks Im going to get these rare illnesses

Customer :

Now i do like the first year book tho

Customer :

have u ever been oregnant? it is definatley an experience

Gina P :

Yes! I did great through my pregnancy, but wasn't prepared for the first year!

Gina P :

There are so many things that can scare you tho

Customer :

its crazy how every body is sooo different

Gina P :

You may want to try to focus on something other than your pregnancy, if you get scared reading.

Customer :

the internet is the worst for scary stuff tho

Customer :

thats a good suggestion

Gina P :

If you feel you are overly anxious, have you discussed this with your OB/GYN who may provide some medications that may be safe.


 

Gina P :

Oh, stay away from google!

Gina P :

My daughter just had her first child in aug and stayed terrified from google :)

Gina P :

Your feelings are very normal. Everyone is concerned about their baby, but few have any problems.

Gina P :

If you are this obsessed I think you are probably taking very good care of yourself!

Customer :

thank you

Gina P :

Spend some time doing things that you enjoy now. Your time will be limited once your little angel is here. Do you have a dog or cat?

Customer :

im scared to to take meds. I took occasional xanax before pregnancy. prob 3 or 4 times total

Customer :

i have a cat who i LOVE

Gina P :

Ok, spend a LOT of time petting your cat. This helps relieve anxiety and depression.

Customer :

i do she naps and snuggles with me alot

Customer :

How do I stop my thinking that I did something wrong'

Gina P :

Practice some relaxation and breathing exercises when you feel anxious. There are lots of methods to do. One I like is to practice deep breathing, in through your nose and out through your mouth. Holding this breath for about five seconds if it is comfortable. After you become comfortable with breathing, add colors to the air. Breath in a color that is calming such as blue and breath out a color you don't like. This gives you a visual perspective also.

Customer :

i like that\

Customer :

how long do i do that

Gina P :

My daughter drank alcohol before she knew she was pregnant for the first two months of her pregnancy.

Customer :

last night i fell asleepon the heating pad and woke up with my side of my back and a little part of my belly touching it. all i can think is i gave my baby brain damage :(

Gina P :

She worried constantly she had damaged the child. She was instructed by me (!) to practice this breathing exercise and clear her mind of the negative, and to replace it with what she was doing RIGHT TODAY.

Customer :

it was very hot

Gina P :

I am sorry i am not waiting on your replies. Let me catch up on the answers!

Gina P :

If you do the breathing exercise, you must do it every day for it to feel calming, and don't wait until you have the anxiety. You are training your brain to have less anxiety, the more you practice. You gain confidence in your ability to manage the anxiety, and your brain won't throw you into anxiety quite so often. It takes 21 days for it to become a habit, and second nature. Practice everyday for about 10-15 minutes or more. It can help you fall asleep also.

Customer :

i like that

Gina P :

As for the baby, your uterus is built very nicely to accommodate your lying on your side, and many other positions. You are doing a fine job of taking care of your little one!

Customer :

do u think i overheated my baby with the heating pad

Gina P :

No, he/she is living in temperature of around 100 degrees now

Gina P :

The uterus is a miraculous incubator!

Gina P :

As your pregnancy progresses, your hormones will increase and you should be feeling really good emotionally.

Gina P :

Have I helped at all?

Customer :

yes a ton

Customer :

i wish you were in my town

Customer :

:)

Gina P :

Do you have ore questions or concerns?

Gina P :

Thank you! You may question me anytime as long as it helps

Customer :

how do i reassure myself she is okay

Gina P :

You must trust that you are doing everything the doctor is telling you, and you are working hard to be the best mom, and that everything will turn out the way it is supposed to be.

Gina P :

That sounds a little cheesy maybe, but most babies are just fine if you are receiving good prenatal care

Customer :

when i do something like falling asleep on the heating pad...how can i forgive myself

Gina P :

As a parent you will learn that we do the best we can, our motivations are good, and we are only human.

Customer :

thank you

Gina P :

We have to forgive ourselves so we can teach our children not to be too hard on themselves when they make mistakes

Customer :

true, i am a perfectionist

Gina P :

We must be willing to treat ourselves the way we want to treat our children. Would you forgive your child if she ade a mistake?

Gina P :

Forgive yourself also.

Customer :

that is the best piece of advice. i think u hit the nail on the head

Gina P :

Oh good!!

Gina P :

I learned that little bit of wisdom as a parent myself!

Gina P :

We are always so much harder on ourselves.

Gina P :

Stay focused on what you are doing that is healthy, and force those negatives out of your head.

Gina P :

Do you have any other questions for me?

Customer :

no. thanks for your help

Gina P :

Let me know how everything turns out for you. I wish you blessings for your family and new little one.

Gina P, LCSW
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 175
Experience: MSW, LCSW, PIP
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