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MN Psychiatrist
MN Psychiatrist, Psychiatrist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 792
Experience:  Physician for 17 years, adult psychiatrist for 13 years working with a wide variety of patients.
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Your live in boyfriend gets caught writing a personal note

Resolved Question:

Your live in boyfriend gets caught writing a personal note to a girl he just met,talking about how" different" he feels, about her.He has been meeting her. You break up. Your Friend/ Boss sends flowers.He is established in his job,graduated from a good school, and is 6 yrs. older .You start talking on skype every night, and after a few months, he comes cross country, to wine and dine you.You have a super time, and have good chemistry,and when he leaves, you are missing him. He brought you "UP" and is fun! ....THEN the old boyfriend calls....your heart sinks. What to do?
Submitted: 6 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  MN Psychiatrist replied 6 years ago.
Hello, I am a psychiatrist.

The BEST predictor of future behavior is past behavior; if your old boyfriend's not been faithful to you in the past, the odds are that he will not be faithful to you in the future.

Why should you YOUR heart sink when your old boyfriend calls? He chose another woman over you. You weren't the unfaithful one. YOU deserve better.

Who knows why he's calling.

If he says it's because he realizes what he lost, good, but it SHOULD take way more than one phone call for you to give him the time of day. Time will reveal him for who he really is.

In the meantime, you FULLY have the right to go on with your life, with whoever that might include. Do NOT settle for less than what you want in a man, or your life will be filled with pain. I say this as a psychiatrist who works almost exclusively with women (since I specialize in treating eating disorders), and I HAVE heard it all. You deserve a GOOD future, and the HAPPIEST one you can have. Life has enough troubles, so don't face the rest of yours with an unfaithful man.

I hope this helps, and I wish you the best.
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