Hello and Welcome to JustAnswer. Your question is not closed until you are satisfied. I am happy to assist you with your question.
It sounds somewhat like OCD, but more like PTSD. The ruminating is an OCD symptom but the heart racing is severe anxiety more in the PTSD range. Has this happened more than once?
yes I have flashbacks of things that happened like years ago too and Ill like say oh god out loud then Ill forget really quickly what I remembered sometimes. I wont tell people what I was thinking because I feel ashamed almost.
You definitely are suffering from PTSD. The flashbacks are diagnostic. What is happening is that when you get in a situation in which you feel both in danger and helpless, the old PTSD symptoms come back, and they keep piggybacking on each other, causing the over-reaction you experienced with the bullying situation. You need to resolve this old trauma and you will find that you ruminate less and have flashbacks much less as well as fewer symptoms of OCD.
but this happened at work and I quit my job because of it. I had to go to an unemployment hearing where the district manager who was basically saying I was a bad manager and thats why this girl bullied me. I think you are right I have thought that myself. thank you
Yes, you need to talk to someone about your feelings and get some validation so you can move on. Never let a bully intimidate you. Bullies are all cowards who fold when they are confronted. Good luck and best wishes.