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Ask Selah R, M.S. LPC Your Own Question

Selah R, M.S. LPC
Selah R, M.S. LPC, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 582
Experience:  Licensed Professional Counselor; over 13+ yrs exp working with adults, teens, & families/couples.
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I spoke to the young woman we have been attempting to comfort.

This answer was rated:

I spoke to the young woman "we" have been attempting to comfort. She spoke of being ...relieved...by your response. She had another question for you. (To me, the answer is obvious...but...) This is her question: why is she drawn to men for comfort..often younger men...and how can she break this cycle, seeing it as self-destructive, and often leading to alcohol
to mask her quilt.
This question has appeared in isolation on the expert page and without any context i.e., it doesn't show as an addendum to your first posts with the expert you wrote to before. If you could address this same post to the expert who previously responded to you (put their expert name in the title of this questions), they will pick it up more quickly---was it Selah?
Dr. Michael, Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 2177
Experience: Licensed Ph.D. Clinical Health Psychology with 30 years of experience in private practive and as a clinical psychology university professor.
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There can be several reasons why someone is attracted to people in a certain age range.

1. Sometimes people have a mental age that seems to place them younger or older than their peers, so they find themselves frequently seeking people in a same age range that does not match their own.

2. Sometimes people pick age based off their need to "help", "rescue," "teach," or "control" a partner.

3. Mid-life crisis and divorce can sometimes throw people into looking for younger partners. This can be because they want the youth, energy, excitement, and higher sex drive that a younger partner can offer. This can also be because they want the "trophy" experience of feeling a higher self-esteem or attractiveness because they were able to get a younger partner. Sometimes it's a misguided effort to try to reclaim the youth and vibrancy they feel like they have lost due to age or in a marriage.

4. Sometimes we're re-enacting the age preferences/differences we were seeing in our family or origin.

So without knowing more information about her and why she thinks she finds younger men attractive, these are the most common causes.

Sincerely,
Selah
Selah R, M.S. LPC, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 582
Experience: Licensed Professional Counselor; over 13+ yrs exp working with adults, teens, & families/couples.
Selah R, M.S. LPC and other Mental Health Specialists are ready to help you
Customer: replied 6 years ago.
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