Thanks for bringing your question to JustAnswer.
This is a tough situation! You're right...being able to pack up and run to mom's house when you two fight just avoids the problem and solves nothing.
However, since her mother has taken a dislike to you , if you try to make your wife stop running to her it will probably make things worse.
Here are some options:
Learn how to solve your differences as they come up, in a respectful way, so that things don't escalate . There is a saying in recovery groups that might help you:
"Do you want to be right, or do you want to be happy?"
This means to think twice about whether an issue is worth fighting about at all. If you find yourself just trying to prove a point...let it go.
You may be amazed at how your wife reacts if she says something that would normally start a fight, and you just answer "You may be right."
It might be helpful if the marriage counselor was the one to explain to your wife that she's corroding the relationship by walking away so often. This also can't be good for your little girl either...to hear her parents fight, and mom dragging her away every time. How is she supposed to feel she lives in a stable home?
I hope I've given you some ideas to help you cope with this situation. Please click ACCEPT if I have. If you need more information, just ask!