Hi. Welcome to JustAnswer. I'm pleased to try to help you today.
I'm sorry to hear that you are having these problems in your life. It sounds like you feel pretty discouraged about all of it. I agree that you need some help, but you're not going to get it from therapists who aren't further enough along on their own path to help you. Also, if you are diagnosed bipolar
, you really need to be on medication to control that. I think that would go a long way to help you feel better.
You have a lot of issues to deal with: overinvolvement with family, alcohol abuse
, sleep problems, self-esteem issues, depression, agoraphobia
. You are going to need some help to get yourself out of this. No offense, but your best efforts have gotten you where you are - so you're going to have to find a way to reach out and get some input from other sources. I'm not at all trying to sound discouraging - because I think it can be done. But it's going to take a lot of desire on your part to want to get better. You can't keep doing the same thing and expect different results. It obviously won't work that way.
My impression is that you are less than excited about therapy - which I understand, but I would encourage you to reconsider. But you would need to put some effort into finding someone who can actually help you. Maybe you could find someone online . There are many sites where you can find a therapist who will work with you online or on the phone.
I would also encourage you to stop drinking. Drinking is a depressant, and it's going to make you feel worse - not better. I know that's easier said than done, but it can be done, and it would make a significant difference. There are also more self-help books than you can imagine that can start guiding you in the direction of the mental health that you desire.
You know, I have a gut feeling that you are really ready to make a change - not just complaining right now, but really ready. I'm going to recommend a couple of books that I think might start you in the direction you want to go. If these don't sound right for you, please look for something else. But take a look at these and see if they feel right. They are: The Power of Intention
by Wayne W. Dyer, and The Law of Attraction in Action: A Down-to-Earth Guide to Transforming Your Life (No Matter Where You're StartingFrom)
by DeXXXXX XXXXX. Again, these may not "fit" for you, but I have a sense that they might.
Don't be afradi to reach out. That's the only way you're going to find what you need. It might be a slow process, but you've got to start somewhere. You started today. Now follow through and keep going.
Best wishes, and please let me know if I can answer any further questions. Tamara