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Carol Kryder LMFT
Carol Kryder LMFT, Mental Health Professional
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 808
Experience:  APA Board Certified, Diplomate,Substance Abuse Professional, 20 years family therapy experience
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One thing I was thinking of doing was the person who I targeted

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<p>dear XXXXX. One thing I was thinking of doing was the person who I targeted at when I had erotomania. he said he isnt scared of me anymore but I think maybe it would be a good idea to send him medical information about the condition? ( i dont think he knows anything about it) He said he wanted to know why I behaved how I did at the time I was ill, and afterwards saying he couldnt work out why I picked him, and he said he was scared of me (when I was ill). I know sending him the stuff isnt going to make him want to be with me etc. but just sending him information (including an online documentary about it on channel 4). I think it might help if he knew the reality of the situation and that he isnt the only person who's been a victim of someone with erotomania might help him deal with what happened? I think it might help his understanding of the situation and hed be aware its an illness? I think I want to send the information to make up for the distress I caused (and I feel guilt) and he doesnt have to question why it happened for the rest of his life. Do you think it could make things feel worse for him if I sent him the information? Thanks Florence</p><p> I just spoke to my support worker and he said it will possibly be a bad idea as he could think Im trying to trying to remain contact with the person and bring things back up for him. I guess that could be true. </p><p> </p>
Hi Florence:

I agree with your support worker. You are feeling guilty and want to make amends. In this case, the best amends you can make are to avoid this man. It is the kindest thing you can do.

Best regards XXXXX XXXXX I wish you well.
Customer: replied 6 years ago.
<p>why is it the kindest?</p><p> </p><p>I just want to be aware as much as possible.</p><p>we did get in contact after I had my erotomanic episode and he did forgive me. but last time we spoke was 4 years ago.</p>
It is kindest, because you want to make sure he knows you are not trying to reconnect with him. He has forgiven you and there has been no contact for 4 years. He has put this behind him, and you need to do it, too. Besides, he may have done his own research by now, and understands the disorder, which is why he was able to forgive you.
Customer: replied 6 years ago.
<p>he knew I was ill, but didnt know what was going on.</p><p>if he bumps into me is it worth telling him? last time saw him in town i ignored him even though he showed signs of interest in talking to me. I was too ashamed to look him in the eye.</p>
I think if you bump into him and he shows signs of wanting to talk to you, it is OK to ask if he would like an explanation of what was wrong with you. If he says "No," then drop it.
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