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I am aware about the diagnosis issue. One psychiatrist recently thought he might be iearly bipolar, but other therapists/psychiatrists have said perhaps just major depressive disorder and substance induced mood disorder. He did have gambling compulsion years ago when he had some money, and the thought was this might have been his only manic presentation. His father refused to get treatment, but his actions are bipolar II like and his father's sister and two half-brothers are diagnosed bipolar. Two of them are on disability, one of them is alcoholic. My ex-husband also is narcissistic and delusional. So one therapist said he could even be schizophrenic from the delusions of grandeur. It is clearly a mess.
My son seemed to do worse on depakote and topamax mood stabilizers from the psychiatrist who thought he might be early bipolar (when he was hospitalized earlier this year).
I just keep wondering if he is on the wrong medicines, but it probably is that if he doesn't stop drinking, his mood disorder will continue and no one can accurately diagnosis him.
That is what therapists have said.
I have given much thought to your comment that he is spoiled. I think there is truth to that. When his father left us when he was 3 (then the divorce didn't happen, and his father came back) but he was an extremely poor father, I felt as though my son had no father at all until I then divorced his father and remarried when my son was age 12. Father abandonment is anothe
another issue that has been discussed, since his father has had nothing to do with him except for some very mean emails.
Feeling sorry for my son, we may have over-indulged him, but he was normal as a teen until late teens when he began drinking and gamblig at college until he was medically withdrawn. My decision of late has been to withdraw all support except for a phone and pay only for a sober house or help him if he goes on Vivitrol injection once a month. I think local counselors support this. I have kept paying for his housing and food if he was cooperating, although we have pulled his car and phones on numerous occasions. He has likely manipulated me to get payments made, then goes back to drinking. I have also told him about 2 weeks ago if he ever stole from me again that I would press charges. I have already pressed charges, as has my husband, for him pushing us around and destroying property when drunk.
I think you are right that I need to stay very firm and cut him off financially. He went into the hospital for detox yesterday.
Thank you very much for your help.