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Your son nor your ex completely owns your relationship with either of them...you own a part of it and you can do what you want to with that part. Sometimes the strongest test of good manners is in how you deal with bad manners. I think this is one of those situations where you hold true to yourself and be who you are.
Your son is getting married. Your son who has been manipulated and brainwashed by your ex. It's tragic, but your son is a victim. Don't allow your ex's rude and hurtful behavior have any more control over you than it already did
You can enjoy searching for gifts for you son and grandchildren and then send them into the wind. It's the thought that counts, and make no mistake: your thoughts count. Your son may not have the internal fortitude to stand up to his controlling father, but you can show grace and dignity in the face of the tragedy. Hold your head up and do whatever YOU
want to do. Do your part and leave the results up to them. It's a way to show respect for yourself and all the others involved by holding fast to your role as a mother.
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