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Clearly you sound anxious and depressed. The best treatment for both these symptoms is a type of therapy. I would recommend the use of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. In CBT, one is taught new ways of thinking and behaving and as a result, one's mood improves. anxiety and panic attacks decrease. In addition CBT is evidenced based as the most effective form of treating anxiety. See:
If you need follow up answers please feel free to ask - best wishes and good luck,
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I have taken zoloft in the passed. Do you recommend medication while doing CBT?
The best form of treatment is a combination of medication and psychotherapy. The medication allows the psychotherapy to work on you while the psychotherapy allows you to make changes. Best wishes.