some basic information. I am 39, 4 kids. Married to not a not so nice guy that ignores me, play World of Warcraft for hours.. i tried to play with him to spend time together but it didn't work cause he spends so much time on it. I eventually started playing by myself. Met a young man, 17, we became good friends, we were drawn to each other pretty quickly. Tried to ignore what I was beginning to feel for him, eventually we ended up in a realtionship online, we developed deep feelings for each other,he was neglected as a young kid and abused by his father. His grandfather is his legal guardian and knew of the relationship, even supported it, though nothing ever phyiscal happend cause of his age and he lives in Canada, well a lot of stuff has happened to him, and he eventually fell to using again after cleaning up after meeting me, he's sitting in a juvenille facility now.. he had been acting weird for about a month but he is clusmsy and has had several head injuires from falling on the ice up there,so I figure that was why he was being weird, forgetting things and having bad headaches and stuff, but then he disappeared for like two days, didn't hear a word from him, I called his grandfather to find out what was going on, found out he didn't live with grandfather anymore, a few mintues later this guy comes on msn, tells me that he got busted for our relatioship but I knew he was lying cause nothing ever physical ever happend between us. Something didn't seem right with his story, so I thought he was trying to get rid of me, I waited to hear from him but found out from his grandfather that it wasn't our relationship that got him in trouble but that he got busted on video for buying, his grandfather told me that it was from before him and I met, but then let things slip that didn't make sense
I talked to a couple of lawyers and they told what I was being told didn't make sense and that I didn't know the whole story, so I emailed his grandfather and demanded the truth from him, he said fine, you want real answers, yes he was using about a month ago, i suspected and he told me that he wasn't addicted but tha t hewas under a lot of pressure and his grandfather let him go and didn't stop him. His own father is serving hard time for selling and his mother commited suicide cause she could not get clean after his father went to jail.. he always swore to me that he was clean and not doing anything, his grandfather even tried to lie for him cause he knew I would be angry if I found out, which explained the lie he told me in the first place, he just didn't want me to be upset with him. I am also a college student working on my bachelor's degree... this situation has me really messed up, I really care for this guy and he has deep feelings for me, sometimes I think he just needs to clean himself up and he'll get better but then how can I ever trust him again after he lied to me and said he was clean.. He was working and saving money and was eventually going to come to the US and become a citizen and stuff.. I am so depressed over this.. I spent almost a year knowing this guy and his family, his grandfather even told me he was glad his grandson found someone who cared about him so much. I have gotten so bad that I've gone into chat rooms looking for nice people to talk to but most of them are just after cybersex which I won't do..My friend is still young so I think he has a chance to get better but this has turned my whole world upside down, he was like my life for almost a year..I know it probably seems strange and all but I'm looking for help for my sanity and not judgement please. I'm sad all time and crying constantly over him being gone. I know that is way beyond dysfunction, which is why I need help.