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Thanks for your reply. My sister and I both agree with your suggestion and also clearly realize this situation is one of "help thyself first" and maybe outside help will be again be offered.
It is simply frustrating and while my middle sister is torn with family obligation, she firmly told our baby sister today she is done.
My nephew and his mother seem to have a "victim" mentality that permeates their lives. Neither acknowledges their choices have led them to where they are at this point and both feel they are entitled to do as they please with no consequences nor accountability. If this is pointed out to them (and not in an accusing manner), it is they are being picked on or it's someone else's fault. No win situation and a sad one.