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Ask Dr. Ed Wilfong Your Own Question

Dr. Ed Wilfong
Dr. Ed Wilfong, Psychologist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 1528
Experience:  Twenty-five years treating all ages; Specialities: psychopharmacology & diagnosis, MMPI-2, testing.
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can I speak to someone now Im all alone & not coping.

Customer Question

can I speak to someone now? I'm all alone & not coping.
Submitted: 4 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Ralph LMHC replied 4 years ago.

Hello,

How can I help you?

Ralph LMHC

Customer: replied 4 years ago.
i don't know. just need to talk to someone. I have just been diagnosed with asperger's syndrome.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
i need to speak to someone just now
Expert:  Ralph LMHC replied 4 years ago.

I am going this up to other experts who can possibly help you. Best wishes and good luck.

 

Sincerely,

Ralph LMHC

Customer: replied 4 years ago.
Is someone going to speak to me just now? i need to speak to someone now.
Expert:  Ralph LMHC replied 4 years ago.

I am forwarding to another expert.

 

Sincerely,

Ralph LMHC

Expert:  Dr. Ed Wilfong replied 4 years ago.
If you speak, as in actually talk, we are not set up for that. Can only type. You show as offline now, so I am not sure what I can do. Ralph is very responsive, he just need you to get the ball rolling.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

i mean type.

i'm still here.

Expert:  Dr. Ed Wilfong replied 4 years ago.
OK, would you like to type with me or have ralph chat with you. We are both online.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
Ralph has given up on me. can u help?
Expert:  Dr. Ed Wilfong replied 4 years ago.
I will try. He asked me to actually. It was misunderstading by what you meant by "speak".

So what would you like to chat about?
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
sorry.
Expert:  Dr. Ed Wilfong replied 4 years ago.
No big deal, happens a lot here.
So what has you so down and sad?

Customer: replied 4 years ago.

it's new year. im all alone. i was recently diagnosed with aspergers. i feel like i have no one to talk to. work is stressful. and i'm afraid of what my employers would do if they found out about aspergers. my parents not acepting the diagnosis.

Expert:  Dr. Ed Wilfong replied 4 years ago.
I am sorry you are alone. I spent many alone and tried to make it fun, the best I could. Like do something special for myself.

I am curious, who told you that you have aspergers? What are your symptoms. Sometimes this gets tossed about and asperger's is almost always identified in childhood.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

i was diagnosed with all sorts of other things first - anxiety, depression, anxious/avoidant personality disorder and some other persnality disorder.

So it was kind of a relief at first to hear that I have aspergers cos it means i don't have personality disorders.

 

i saw apsychotherapist and he thought that i might have aspergers cos i didn't respond to treatment as he hoped. i kept on asking him hat he has getting at and could we not wite something down.

then i saw an expert and filled in questionnaires and did a test about peoples facial expressions and he talked to my parents. and he has ritten a report.

Expert:  Dr. Ed Wilfong replied 4 years ago.
WOw, this is no way to diagnose aspergers.
I would focus on the problems. It sounds like you have a rather chronic depression and anxiety. For the couselor to decide there is something else wrong because you didn't responded how he wanted. Maybe he isn't that good :-) or you have what is known as dysthmia, which is chronic , long term depression, that often takes quite some time and often a combination medication and therapy to help. The facial thing may suggest that you are not real interested or "tuned in" to the feelings of others, if it means anything at all. What do you think?
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
i don't know, there is other stuff too. like i cant cope with other people touching me. i was in hospital with adominal pain a couple of years ago & a doctor was trying to examine my abdomen and i couldn't tolerate it v.well. he phoned my own doctor and asked if i had been abused.
Expert:  Dr. Ed Wilfong replied 4 years ago.
Have you been abused?
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
i dont think so
Expert:  Dr. Ed Wilfong replied 4 years ago.
Do you think you may have been?
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
my mum could be a bit off but i don't think it was abuse
Expert:  Dr. Ed Wilfong replied 4 years ago.
So mom probably didn't serve as a happy role model and teach you to interact with others. Perhaps during yoour early childhood, maybe you weren't taugh to cope or relate to people as a lot of people do.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
maybe. my mum was v against the diagnosis and found an excuse for everything. but the expert still thinks i have aspergers.
Expert:  Dr. Ed Wilfong replied 4 years ago.
Aspergers, if you have it is on a spectrum, meaning you can have major symptoms or minor symptoms. At worse, you sound very functional. You have a job, a life. How does the diagnosis change you.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

it could ruin my career to start with. Then i find the diagnosis too woolly. I want to know a definite have i got it or not and if i do, i want to know what my specific difficulties are so that i can work on them. apparently, that's a bit of a black and white asperger response.

 

it's messing with my head.

Expert:  Dr. Ed Wilfong replied 4 years ago.
Ya, I am afraid it is messing with your head. Who plans on telling your employer??? If you are doing your job, it doesn't matter.

There is no definate yes/no. I wish psychology was that easy.

Let me ask - are you having trouble relating to me??
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

i was told that it was up to me to tell employer. that means it wil be kept secret as long as possible.

 

i don't mind speaking to people over the internet, it is more difficult in real life. i would quite happily live a virtual life.

Expert:  Dr. Ed Wilfong replied 4 years ago.
There is no reason to tell your employer. You are the same person you were before this "label" got attached to you. I wouldn't tell anyone, as they would not understand. I am not sure you understand (no offense, this is complicated stuff).

You seem nice and able to relate to me well, online or not. It is always harder face to face, for me to. Yet you must do enough to get by.

Perhaps the best approach is just to decide what you are good at and what you want to improve. Forget the diagnosis. Just a box to put you in. I deal with people , not boxes.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

what do i not understand?

Expert:  Dr. Ed Wilfong replied 4 years ago.
You probably should not tell anyone - they would not understand.

You relate to me fine. We gets lots of requests to chat on line like we are doing. We turn them down. Can you see that if you were so bad, I wouldn't spend my time here, with you, as opposed to taking care of other requests?
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
i'm confused. what do u mean?
Expert:  Dr. Ed Wilfong replied 4 years ago.
we have been chatting over an hour
If I didn't see something positive in you, I wouldn't be here
I think you are trying to let this diagnosis decide "who you are"
I think it is a crappy diagnosis and you should decide what you want to improve.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.

i feel like i need someone else to notice what needs improving. i can't see it so well myself. the other personality disorder has just come back to me now - it was dependent personality disorder.

 

the whole diagnosis process of aspergers has in some way helped. i've not been on antidepressants fr a few months now. granted, they were stopped as i was getting chest pain but the psychiatrist has saidni dont need any now.

Expert:  Dr. Ed Wilfong replied 4 years ago.
As personality disorders goes, dependant is not that bad. Persoanlity disorders get horrible reputations because of the really detrimental one. Yours means, as you just told me, that you lack some confidence in making decisions for yourself. Not such a horrible thing.
If this process has helped learn what helps you, but don't make the mistake of thinking that everything in a diagnosis applies to you.
If you need help setting goals, let your counsellor help you. Whether it be aspergergers, Dependant Persoanlity, or depression, getting better is all about finding ways to improve yourself and feel better about yourself. It makes no difference what label you have.
I am not in a position to comment on your treatment (meds etc) as I don't know you that well. But use your stregths to make yourself better.
Customer: replied 4 years ago.
thanks for your time i'm gonna go to bed now as it's 3am and i'm working a 12hr shift in the morning. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaagggggghhhhhhh!!!!!
Expert:  Dr. Ed Wilfong replied 4 years ago.
I hope i was able to help. Sleep well. Accepting my answer, feedback and even a small bonus is appreciated. I usually spend 5 min/question.
Takr good care of self.

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Chat Now With A Mental Health Professional
Dr. Ed Wilfong
Dr. Ed Wilfong
Mental Health Professional
1528 Satisfied Customers
Twenty-five years treating all ages; Specialities: psychopharmacology & diagnosis, MMPI-2, testing.