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Nancy, Psychotherapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 746
Experience:  ABD for a PhD in Psychology, Psychotherapist for over 20 years
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My son was raised by a violent stepfather who physically assaulte

Customer Question

My son was raised by a violent stepfather who physically assaulted his mother and regularly threatened to kill my son.My son is now aged 42 ,married with children. To my astonishment ,he regularly associates with this man andtreats him as a family member.. His mother became an alcoholic and died after an overdose.He tells me that his stepfathr now shows remorse for his actions . My son is now suffering from type 1 diabetes and has recently been reporting signs of panic attacks.IE racing heart chest pains etc .Tests have shown his heart is normal. Should he be seeking psychiatric help.?
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Nancy replied 7 years ago.

Since he's already seen his regular Dr, then yes, he should seek, first, an evaluation for Panic/Anxiety, and if the psychiatrist find he has that, then he can take either an anti-anxiety medication, or, more likely an antidepressant (which aren't addicting the way most anti-anxiety meds are).

Customer: replied 7 years ago.
His doctor has presribed anti depressants. But I am very concerned with his unhealthy friendshiop with his stepfather who was his abuser.Is this a psychriatic condition connected to the Stockholm Syndrome and what should be done toremedy the siiiiituation?
Expert:  Nancy replied 7 years ago.
If his father was still abusing him, then there would be a problem, but as long as he wants a relationship with his father, despite his father being horribly abusive, there is no problem.

If your son reports that he, himself is miserable and doesn't want a relationship - but feels compelled to have one, for feels forced to have one, then there is a problem.

But, as long as it's non-abusive now, and your son wants it this way, then there is no problem.

I know you are concerned and feel like there should better boundaries between them, but honestly, there is little you can do when they get along now. All children want relationships with their parents - no matter how bad it was when they were little - and this may be good to heal the old wounds of your son - where he can move on from the abuse and heal with his Dad in his life.

Customer: replied 7 years ago.


You seem unable to answer my quetion satisfactorily in a professional manner.


Your reply contains no reference to the "Stockholm Syndrome" and I assume from that ,that you have no knowledge of a well known psychriactic condition.


Your reply is in an "Agony Aunt" manner and one which I could expect from any newspaper and is therefore totally unhelpful. I cannot accept your answer and therefore do not expect to be charged .


Yours etc.

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