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I am really sorry to know about what you had to go through , but i believe the real culptrit here had been your pot abuse , anyways it is still not late , so i will suggest you to discuss the below mentioned treatment regime for Anxiety and Depression with your psychiatrist/ psychologist / doctor and also attain abstinence from alcohol.
1) 1 anti depressant such as either Effexor XR ( venlafaxine extended release ) or Paxil CR ( paroxetine controlled release ).Any one of these two is to be chosen and started , both are long actiing anti depressants ,which work throughout the day , and have least side effects due to their slow release into the system.Let your doctor decide the dose and time of intake of the chosen anti depressant , preferably it is to be taken once a day only , as either of them are slow release tablets ..
2) 1 anti anxiety drug such as Klonopin ( clonazepam ) or Ativan ( lorazepam ) , to be started as a single daily dose , which is to be increased slowly to twice a daily dosage . Ask your doctor to start you on a low dose first and slowly raise the dose over 3-5 days .
3) 1 mood stabilizer such as either Lithium or Valproate , preferably lithium as it works well in depression which does not react to anti depressants alone , as in your case as it seems , so addition of lithium to effexor XR or Paxil CR will not only help you in coming out of depression , but will also prevent your mood fluctuations and paranoid thoughts.
The above mentioned drugs need to be continued for atleast 4-6 months , without any default / fail , as only then will they be able to help in treating your Depression and anxiety.
Also , psychotherapy ( counseling in lay terms) is a good additive therapy along with drug therapy which is mentioned above , but , you start on this later once your symptoms have improved a bit with the use of drugs mentioned above, and it is quite likely that the drug therapy alone is sufficient in treating your condition of depression and anxiety .
So, i suggest that you discuss the above mentioned regime with your Doctor / psychiatrist and get started on it , and i am quite sure that it will be able to treat your condition .Also , i will request you to attain abstinence from alcohol as it will impair / block the positive effect of these drugs , plus it is bad for your health.
I wish you best of health.
I hope my answer serves your query according to your satisfaction.
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