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Shana Parsons
Shana Parsons, Therapist
Category: Mental Health
Satisfied Customers: 13
Experience:  Masters Degree, 8 mos shy of PHD and a license to practice in TX (in process of full licensure)
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if i have a behavoiral and lying issue with possible other

Resolved Question:

if i have a behavoiral and lying issue with possible other mental issues with an 11 yr ago do i need psychology or physcharistry?
Submitted: 7 years ago.
Category: Mental Health
Expert:  Shana Parsons replied 7 years ago.
What is the behavioral issue?
Customer: replied 7 years ago.

lying...not completing tasks ..lying about completing task ......most of these occurances are school related ..others are when he has done somthing he knows that will get him in trouble ... wont taking respnsibilty for his actions ...almost all concerns stem from lying

i tend to think it might be a devlopmental issue..he acts younger

he is a the smaller twin has adhd ..i am step mom ..his birth mother is bi polar

he does not seems to have mood swings..but shows little to no emotion ..nothing paheses him ...grounding punishment....nothing

Expert:  Shana Parsons replied 7 years ago.
OK. The ADHD may have a lot to do with this.
BUT the lying is another issue.
Does he just act this way with you or does he do this same behavior with his mother and father? What about his teachers? What do they say?

My initial advice is that this problem is something that would be better addressed in counseling and possibly a psychiatrist if his ADHD medication is not working.
By counseling I mean FAMILY counseling. Not just him by himself.
there is also a good book I've read called "raising kids you can live with" by jamie Raser.
it is short, easy to read and I think it might help some here.

The thing is to get everyone on board with how he is going to be disciplined and his daily structure.
also his relationships with you, his mom and dad and any other step parent involved.
Does he take ADHD meds now?

Customer: replied 7 years ago.
yes he takes concerts 54 mg..high dosage for his weight ...he is getting a couple a's acouple b's and c's in school school teachers know that he usually do extra credit one instance his he came home said there was none to me, e-mailed teacher she states she asked hime twice if he wanted it..also he has in class tutors.. he will not ask for help if he does not understand ...teachers have told me this...when asked why he got a low grde on something and why he didnt ask for help he will tell you and continue to tell you he understand his work and didnt need help ....his birth mom only sees him on every other weekend....and he plays there he try to get her help in studying or reading and usually little to no results is out of town alot on work ..but over the years has more and more backed me on displine and what is expected ..although he does make excuses for is behavoir to me at times...never to my son ..i got him when he was 8 has a bed wetter behind in school and have work constantly ( although witha fight) get him to more current levels in schools, has not wet in 1-2 years ....but i cant stop the lies
Expert:  Shana Parsons replied 7 years ago.
So he's got a lot of help at school but has trouble asking for help.
He may be a little developmentally behind but he sounds like he can do well if he puts his mind to it.
My answer then is still the same,
I would look for a counselor (maybe a male) who specializes in working with boys with behavioral problems and who can also do some family counseling, or maybe a separate one for family counseling.

maybe have counseling with the two of you since you are the primary disciplinarian.
But honestly this will all be easier if you could get as many people as possible who are his caretakers on the same page and in agreement on how it will be handled.
If you do one thing and then his mother does another, that will be tough to deal with.
I still recommend the book.
It may be that he also feels behind and this is causing insecurity in him, leading to lying, etc. etc.
this is just a guess, a stab in the dark.
Does this answer your question?
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