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Sexual abuse does effect a child's thoughts, feelings and behaviors about sex, but that does not mean you are gay.
Sexual abuse causes a child to relive the abuse in their head. It repeats over and over, and since sexual images are arousing, it can be confused with having simple sexual fantasies.
Sexual attraction toward other men is an indication that someone is gay, but since you have been sexually abused-- you have to keep that in mind.
There is nothing wrong with being gay. Being gay is a biological function of the brain; it is not a choice, it is just an attraction toward men, by men. If you do find you are gay - and you feel you need to talk to someone, find a gay therapist to help you with the issues you will face. But DON'T get down on yourself or think there is anything wrong.
And, email ME back at ANY TIME!!!! I am always here for you!
Sorry -- I'll answer again tomorrow!
Thanks for your patience!
I am back online and we can continue to talk about this. One thing I want you to be clear of though, is the impact that sexual abuse has on young people; it plays over and over in a person's mind - but because it is arousing, it can be confused with being an arousing fantasy - but is not. It is a process of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).
Have you ever been to counseling regarding the sexual abuse?
If you have been sexually abused, you will have sexual thoughts about other men.
If you are sexually attracted to men, you are gay.
Do you see the difference?
I think what happens to you is that when you were abused - it may have sexually aroused you at some point - which is normal (although not good you were abused).
Now, in your normal realm of fantasizing, you imagine men.
But in your day to day life, you are attracted to women.
Does that answer your question?
I am so happy to hear that my answer has helped you.
What I want to suggest is that you seek ongoing help from a local professional. ALthough we are all experts here at Just Answer - we cannot do ongoing counseling. This serviceis designed jsut for questions and answers.
To find a local professional, look in your local Yellow Pages under "Counselor"- look for someone who specializes in Sexual Abuse. There are always professionals who will work with people for a low cost or even free of charge.