Trauma in a relationship takes a lot of time to get over, expecially when it's sudden. Sometimes we get into relationships where we let go of friends and when he leaves, we are left with little or nothing. Sometimes we put too much of ourselves into it and when he leaves, it feels like he's taken it all with him.
It takes a lot of *conscious* effort to put our lives back together. We have to place limits on ourselves-- like only allowing ourselves to think about him for a specific time each day -- say 15 minutes of nothing but thoughts of him -- then consciously avoiding thoughts of him when it pops into our head.
Only allow yourself to think about the bad times-- not the good times.
All those things everyone says, like, join a support group -- THAT HELPS!
Join a book club if you like to read -- or start a walking club with friends.
Take a class in something you've always wanted to learn - like Japanese cooking. All these little things add up to take up all the old "him" time. Maybe someof it it totally LAME, but do it anyway-- it's better for you than sitting around being angry, sad, crying and drinking. If any of that worked -- you'd be over him by now.
I hope this helps...