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Well, the problem that you are facing is quite common, and although there are drugs available for ADD, but, alone drugs will not be able to treat your lack of attention or ability to think ahead. Since you have had fare share of psychostimulants with little effect on yor condition , so it is inferential to change the present psychostimulant drugs such as ritalin or focalin with a new psychostimulant , and along with this you need to be started on psychotherapy.
So, i suggest, you replace your present psychostimulant , whether it is ritalin or focalin with a new psychostimulant drug such as Adderall XR (amphetamine salt).Discus it's dose & time of intake with your doctor.
Along with this new drug , you seek help from a psychologist/psychotherapist and get yourself started on Psychotherapy. Effective psychotherapies used in ADD are-- Cognitive behavioural terapy , Behaviour therapy , Interpersonal therapy , psychoeducation , family therapy. These psychotherapy account for great improvement in one's attention, concentration, spontaneous thinkng.
Besides the above mentioned 2 options , you may start doing Yoga. There are lots of postures (aasans) in yoga which help you in developing your concentration and attention.So, you can learn about it in some literature or DVD on Yoga, or you may get enrolled at yoga teaching center.
I know, you are not able to get much support from your husband as you would have expected to , but nevertheless, now you have an opportunity to show him that you can achieve this on your own & shall take all the credit of your new found self .
I wish you all the best.
I hope my answer serves your query according to your satisfaction.