Talking to a therapist could be really helpful for you. Sometimes talking with someone about your anxiety and panic can help you a) identify very specific triggers (sometimes even a thought, image, smell, etc. can trigger anxiety), b) learn strategies to manage anxiety, and c) learn how to keep anxiety from impacting your relationships so much.
Some of the particular skills that a therapist can teach you about managing anxiety include identifying irrational thoughts (we all have them) and then coming up with replacement ones, learning relaxation skills (such as deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, and/or guided meditations) that you can use when you start to get anxious, and finding ways to keep your anxiety from negatively impacting your marriage and relationship with your kids (for example, using time-outs for yourself, etc.).
There are certainly medications that can help you manage anxiety too and I don't think you need to be shy about asking for one. Most doctors- even general practitioners- know about and prescribe these kinds of meds regularly.