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Family Physician
Family Physician, Doctor
Category: Medical
Satisfied Customers: 2592
Experience:  Emergency Medicine and Family Practice for over 26 years
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I need a psychologist to ask for an opinion: I overstepped

Customer Question

I need a psychologist to ask for an opinion:
I overstepped my boundries with my son in law if you read the note below. He is a very unique person, and I was wrong to push him. Our daughter loves him, she was in China and I had a misunderstanding with my son in law and
I need to know if you think my relationship with him is salvageable by what he said to me. You can see my response to him. I also need to know if I should show my daughter this correspondance My first thought is that I should.
Background:
I had been very cruel to our daughter as a child and very wrong to do so. There were some incidents of some holes made in clothing that I wanted to stop but went too far and have had to accept that I cant go back to change anything and that I can only become a better person and today I have a great relationship with my daughter, I felt she has forgiven me, even though I am sure there are emotional scars that can never be healed (also in me who caused her pain which I am extremely sorry for)
I had told his mother that he should have called me back to let me know if I was supposed to pick up his daughter from school and that was the only focus of the incident I overstepped my bounderies I accept but does it warrent all of the below or was it a long time festering?
My son in law said after that incident with him:
“I will pick up Sophia and Gus until Abby gets back, and then we will go from there.
After what you did yesterday, I have no concern over what you like and dont like.
There is no excuse for the things that you said to my family yesterday, and I refuse to act like nothing happened
I dont have time for your insanity
Everyone else may be afraid of you, but I am definitely not.
Please don’t bother us anymore until abby gets back and we can figure this out.
You of all people gave a lecture on respect, responsability and manners.
That could not be more hypocritical.
And before you think of taking this out in Abby or anyone else.
Please know that I have heard all the stories, from many different people of the torture you put Abby through as a child, and unless you want the world to know your filthy secrets, you need to take responsability for your own actions.
Up until yesterday, I’ve given you respect, that you dont deserve for the sake of my family. That ended yesterday.
You need to get professional hep for your mental state, and you owe Gus, Sophia and my mother a written apology.
And one last thing that you dont know about my parents is that they have more money than you will ever see in your life.
My grandfather was the vice president of Shell oil company for fifteen years, and all of his savings sit in my parents account. All I have to do is ask for some, and especially after seeing you in action, it will please them to be able to help in any way they can, because they love us. So if you want to pretend that you can threaten us by taking money away that.s not going to work iether.
If you actually care about any of us, you will take the responsibility for the hell on earth that you créate for people.
Right now this message is between you , and me. I think it is in your best inteest to keep it that way.
The last thing my mother wants to do is hear your voice, or see your face. If the kids werent there yesterday she would have eaten you alive.
And you terrified Gus and Sophia. If you try to come by, the door will be locked.
My children just got home and I am done with this. Your chance to apologize was this morning when you got out of bed, not after I reminded you.
Your apology means nothing. Actions speak louder than words.
When Abby gets back we will deal with this. My mom does not want to see you. If you want her address I will give it to you. I am turning my phone off. If you come here the door will be locked.
You came over uninvited yesterday.”
My response:
Dear *****,
I sent this fast before abby gets back so you can decide or not to share with abby thanks
I am sorry about what happened, It won’t happen again, and I overstepped! And I hope you accept my apology! And that we can go back to being friends!
On Tuesday I tried to call you several times from the class trip and from CIS when we got back from the class trip to find out if you were coming to get Sophia to take her home, I would have been happy to take her but wanted to avoid you driving there to look for her and her not being there. When Sophia was excused about 3:10 I waited until 3:40 for you but when I did not see you I thought it was best for me to take her home. (I dont use text too much and didn’t have your phone number with me Sophia gave it to me on the bus on the class trip, but now I know it is best to use text as you dont have a good signal)
When I got to your house your mom said you had gone to get Sophia, and I felt bad, as I knew you had been up a lot with Augustus and the feeling you would have of going to get your
Submitted: 1 month ago.
Category: Medical
Expert:  Dr. David replied 1 month ago.

Hello, this is Dr. David. I am reviewing your question now and will be with you momentarily.

Expert:  Dr. David replied 1 month ago.

yes, you can over time help repair the relationship with your son inlaw.

you can work towards having better communication with him.

you should work on text messages which many young people use now to communicate.

make sure you let him know if you are going to pick up her children so they know where they are all the time.

the relationship can be repaired over time.

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