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Good morning. I certainly understand the situation and your concern. It is hard to anticipate what the future will hold, as you shared above. As such, it would be difficult to say if X, Y and Z, happened then A would result. However, you can put language that if the parents can not agree, informally, that the parties shall be required to attend mediation, in hopes that a third party can step in and help to resolve this. If not, then the parties will be required to proceed through the court and let the Judge decide, knowing that it is impossible to know how the Judge will rule. Yes, you can speak with your son and listen to him but at the end of the day, you and your husband have to agree or the Judge needs to decide.
Do you think he would agree to something like this?