Thank you for using our forum. My name is ***** ***** I hope to assist you with this matter today.
You have two separate (but related) issues that you will want to address.
With regard to your wife, there are criminal charges that may be levied against her (you say she has been arrested, even if she is no longer in custody at the moment, she is still facing potential prosecution). She will want to retain a criminal defense attorney to represent her.
If she cannot afford an attorney, the court will appoint an attorney to represent her (to do this, she will want to contact the County Public Defender's Office).
She should not speak to law enforcement without her attorney present - and she should only respond when instructed by her attorney.
The fact that she was arrested prior to being Mirandized may give her attorney a potential avenue to help defend her (if testimony is given without proper warnings, the testimony cannot be used in evidence at trial, and any information that law enforcement gets based on that testimony is also disallowed (this is called "fruit from the poisoned tree"). But these are things that your wife's attorney will want to deal with.
Your children and their placement. You say that you have a family member traveling to CA to take custody of the children while you are making arrangements for them. This should deal with the situation in the short term.
As far as dealing with the inconsiderate and rude treatment by the staff and employees of the CPS division and the foster care home, unfortunately there is not a lot you can do here to be compensated. (I say this from experience working in these types of offices - elder care and conservatorship offices in different counties), but you can (and should) file complaints regarding this conduct - probably after you get a resolution to your case, it doesn't make good strategic sense to create more problems with these people who are going to have a lot of input into the resolution of your case now. But you can complain to the District Attorney's Office, the County Counsel, and to the Court's Administrative Division (all of which have oversight over the CPS division).
I do not know that there will be any actual resolution over this - unfortunately my experience has been that these departments operate with a great deal of immunity from criticism and review, but unless citizens raise these issues there will be no oversight whatsoever. Bringing these considerations to your elected officials (County Supervisor) can be even more influential as they must respond to their constituents and are often more responsive to these complaints.
If your children are harmed - then you can file suit, but unfortunately the conduct you describe is probably not going to result in significant recovery (you can always consult with a local attorney - usually a probate attorney (a civil litigation attorney that specializes in the probate department of the courts) is going to be well placed to deal with this, or a family law attorney with a strong litigation background.