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You say "I am not supposed to contact the plaintiff" - is this because of a court restraining order? or is it just because the letter that the attorney sent you said so?
If it is due to a court restraining order - you should not send a letter directly to the individual - you should send it to the attorney (I understand your concerns regarding "filtering" of your letter - but if you have a restraining order against you - you do not want to risk violating that (do not have a third party try to send communications on your behalf "around" a restraining order.
However, if you are "not supposed to contact" because of what the attorney says in his letter - you are free to send your response to both the individual and his attorney (or just the individual - although I recommend sending it to both and clearly "cc'ing" it - no reason to conceal the fact - you want both of them to know that they are receiving the same document).
BE AWARE: anything you write may show up in a later legal proceeding as an exhibit to be introduced into evidence - so be very careful when drafting your correspondence, and keep copies of everything!
You can respond - these things can become serious (a restraining order is easy for someone to file - even if it is based on false accusations (it doesn't mean it will get granted, but it is something you will have to deal with)).
One other thing you can consider is contacting a mediator - use a third party neutral to try to resolve this dispute. Contact your county bar association and ask for referrals.
Hire a lawyer - you can revoke all of these things, he shouldn't have any of this power over you.
You can do this with a simple signing, immediately.
But given the scope of the involvement that you have with this individual, and the urgency of the matter - you need a lawyer to assist you.
(I know customers do not come to this forum to be told "go hire a lawyer" - but you really need one here, it shouldn't be a very complicated matter to resolve, but you want someone that will do it in a competent, professional, and business like manner).
You can find local attorneys using the State and local Bar Association directories, or private directories such as www.AVVO.com; www.FindLaw.com; or www.Martindale.com (I personally find www.AVVO.com to be the most user friendly).
A general practitioner will be more than adequate for this type of matter - you do not need a specialist.
As a general rule - yes, you can still communicate with him even though you have received a notice from the attorney saying not to.
The letter from the attorney is a threat - the threat is if you don't stop communicating they will file a court action asking for a restraining order. If they get a restraining order, that will have the effect of law - and at that time you will no longer be allowed to contact the individual.
But in your case, I really would get a lawyer, and let the lawyer handle all of this (including your response) - there is nothing you are going to want to write to him tonight that your attorney cannot handle for you on Monday - and in some (read: "most") cases it may simply be better to allow your attorney to handle this from a strategic perspective.
You are welcome, and I do wish you the best with this matter.
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Thank you again, and again I wish you the best.