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Ely, Counselor at Law
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Seeing a man for a year. Found out he had a girlfriend. Misdirected

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Seeing a man for a year. Found out he had a girlfriend. Misdirected anger, I tell girlfriend. Man and I stupidly try to be friendly. GF finds out. Hell breaks loose. (Last Thursday) she files complaint with police department over two emails. Never threatening. Just hey, I'm sorry we both got hurt. Telling you the way I told you wasn't nice. He has cut off all contact with me. The police went to my work asking about "an incident". No conversation, altercation or interaction has ever occurred at my work. Admittedly I hammered the guy with texts, emails, to me please....etc. If this had been going on a year I'd be likeiI'm crazy. But the pain is a week old. Should I ask for the names of their attorneys?
Hello friend. My name is XXXXX XXXXX welcome to JustAnswer. Please note: (1) this is general information only, not legal advice, and, (2) there may be a slight delay between your follow ups and my replies.

I am sorry for your situation. Can you please clarify:

1) The police reached out to you over whose complaint exactly - hers, or his?

2) Are you actually charged with anything, or not? Do you know if the matter has been dropped?

3) Why are you asking for their attorneys - what are you hoping to accomplish here by doing so? In other words, what do you want to achieve?

This is not an answer, but an Information Request. I need this information to answer your question. Please reply, so I can answer your question. Thank you in advance.
Customer: replied 3 years ago.

She was the one who got the police involved. They just called me. No charges. I explained a love triangle gone awry. I guess I'm thinking if she continues to badger me, I've stopped all communication, i can just hand it off to my attorney.

Thank you for your reply, W.

First of all, please understand how this works, and what your options here are.

The process works this way:
1. The police investigate, which involves interviewing all parties involved;
2. The police make a file of the case, along with a recommendation as to whether or not to charge;
3. The file gets handed to the District Attorney who makes the final decision as to whether or not to charge;
4. If you are charged, you may be arrested or summoned to Court.
5. If at step 1, you make a confession or something tantamount to one, you may be arrested then and there, and then the D.A. will file charges.

Hence, talking to the police is very dangerous! Now you already have, but in the future, it is best to use counsel to do so. You have the right not to talk to the police. You have the right to have an attorney act as your agent, and agree to an interview, or simply release a statement, or something in between, etc. Whatever your counsel feels is best. However, it seems that the police have dropped this matter and likely, it will not result in any issues provided no serious threats by you were made (if not, then there is no case for any criminal charges).

If you feel that she has filed a false police report on you, you may wish to pursue her for (1) defamation and (2) intentional infliction of emotional distress.

INTENTIONAL INFLICTION OF EMOTIONAL DISTRESS - this tort requires four elements to be proved: (1) the wrongdoer's conduct was intentional or reckless; (2) the conduct was outrageous and intolerable; (3) there was a causal connection between the wrongdoer's conduct and the emotional distress; and (4) the emotional distress was severe. Harris v. Kreutzer, 624 SE 2d 24 - Va: Supreme Court 2006.

DEFAMATION is (1) publication of (2) an actionable statement with (3) the requisite (malicious) intent. Jordan v. Kollman, 612 SE 2d 203 - Va: Supreme Court 2005.

Now, you ask: "Should I ask for the names of their attorneys?" They may not have attorneys. However, you may wish to pursue a civil case for her filing this false report, or simply drop the matter.

If you due pursue, an attorney is recommended. May I recommend the VA Bar referral program - here. The attorneys are vetted and qualified. You should be able to find an attorney you are confident with and whom you can trust, and who is available ASAP.

I hope this helps and clarifies. Good luck.

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Customer: replied 3 years ago.

Yes, no threats at all were made. Just the sad, please talk me be barrage of emails and texts that one associates with love gone south. She is definitely the one who pushed the proverbial button. What I've also found out, from him, is that he cheated on his wife with her. Wife started in and rightly so, but she was going to possibly press charges against then wife ( but because children were involved, he talked girlfriend down) I know. What a mess right? Run like heck and take it as a learning experience. Thank you for your help.

It is a bit of mess, but, it looks like you have the matter handled now. And no threats/serious harassment = no criminal actions. Best of luck.

Thank you for your help.

You are very welcome. Good luck, and please don't forget to rate my answer in one of top three faces and then SUBMIT – it is the only way I get credit for my time with you – or, please REPLY to keep on chatting – I want you to be satisfied.
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