Hi - my name is XXXXX XXXXX I'm a litigation
attorney. Thanks for your question, but I'm sorry for your situation.
If your student loans were incurred BEFORE you were married, then your husband is not liable for the debt. However, if your student loans were incurred during the marriage, then your husband would be liable for the debt since New Mexico is a community property state.
As for dealing with the student loans, aside from participating in a deferral or forbearance program endorsed by the lender, the only way to try and get some relief is to file bankruptcy. I'm sure you've heard that student loans are not dischargeable, and that is generally true. But, there is a hardship exception to the law that does allow a discharge IF one can show that paying the student loans back makes it impossible for you to pay for necessities - - such as food, shelter and clothing. Here's a good link you can read about hardship discharges: http://www.studentloanborrowerassistance.org/bankruptcy/
Don't get me wrong, this is not a given, but it is possible to discharge all, or even part, of your student loans in order to reduce the debt and free your monthly income up. If you want to pursue this, you should consult a local attorney in your area about the possibility of filing bankruptcy.
If you don't file bankruptcy, and you default on the loan, the lender will sue and obtain a judgment against you. Once that happens, it will issue wage garnishments, bank garnishments and can even levy execution against your property. Whether or not your husband is implicated or liable depends on when the student loans were obtained as we discussed above.