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Ask Lawyer Lori Your Own Question

Lawyer Lori
Lawyer Lori, Attorney
Category: Legal
Satisfied Customers: 2150
Experience:  10 years of legal experience.
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what do I need to prove adultrey in divorce?

Resolved Question:

what do I need to prove adultrey in divorce?
Submitted: 1 year ago.
Category: Legal
Expert:  Lawyer Lori replied 1 year ago.

Lawyer Lori :

Good evening. My name is XXXXX XXXXX I will be the professional assisting you today. As this varies a bit state to state, can you tell me what state the divorce has been or will be filed in?

Customer:

In Lousiana.

Customer:

The date is May 17th of this month. She wants final support but she cheated but I need to know how to prove it.

Lawyer Lori :

Please give me a couple of minutes to check on something.

Customer:

Thank you

Lawyer Lori :

In Louisiana, you (the party alleging that the other has committed adultery) has the burden of proof, and in that requires more than the adulterer's testimony or you proving that they had the opportunity to commit adultery. There must be corroborative evidence presented.

Lawyer Lori :

Using a private detective to take photos through the window is the best evidence you can get, but that can be expensive and may not be necessary, Through your testimony, and the testimony of uninterested third parties, that she spent the night or several hours in their home/hotel with the other man. Receipts from hotels, dinners, etc. where there is no other reasonable inference of what was going on are helpful. Copies of e-mails (maybe even cell phone bills showing communication).

Customer:

I have the hotel security camera, but her, her friend, and the guy I think she was with all went in together. I hacked into her email account and got some messages. She is denying anything happen though. Do you think I have enough information? She stayed at home during our marriage so unless I can prove it I am told she will likely recieve the final support.

Lawyer Lori :

Well, the camera is pretty good evidence, but if you cannot show that the friend left, your wife may claim that the friend and the guy were together and she just stayed cause her friend was there. Together with the e-mails, that might be enough if it showed her attraction and willingness. Don't suppose that the friend would testify on your behalf and against your wife.

Lawyer Lori :

You do need something more than your thinking that she is having or had n affair.

Customer:

The friend is saying she doesn't know anything. I didn't want my wife around so I gave her the hotel money to get out while I was home. (I work offshore.) I went with a 102 divorce (living seperate and apart for 365). I only have the camera, and the emails but nothing else. I am wondering if its even worth it? Is it really as hard as they say to prove adultrey occured?

Lawyer Lori :

So you paid for the hotel to get her out of your home will you were there, and then she had him and a friend into her temporary home. I hate to say this, but since you knew she was at the hotel (and you were paying for it) and the camera shows another woman and a man entering the room with her and without any direct evidence of sexual relations between them, it would probably be extremely difficult to get a ruling of adultery.

Lawyer Lori :

And there could be a reasonable explanation for his presence - dating the friend, continuing a conversation in her home.

Customer:

She was a stay at home wife though. I had to pay for everything. I understand what you are saying though. I thought the emails of them talking could help. They are the reason I put her out in the first place. Can I ask one more question?

Lawyer Lori :

If the e-mails discuss an affair, where to meet, talk of past meetings, items of sexual relevance and that it is more likely than not that there was an affair, than it would be helpful and might be enough - depending on the content.

Lawyer Lori :

And your other question is:

Customer:

Are you familiar with Lousiana custody? I would like a 7/7 schedule. Its a Wednesday change over (that's when I get off the boat) every week. My son is autistic. Do you think I can still get this type of custody? My chldren are 9 and my son (autistic) is 7. I only want them when I am off the boat. The rest of the time she can have them.

Lawyer Lori :

I am aware of the Louisiana custody laws which look to the best interests of the children; however, I have not dealt with them personally. If you and your wife could agree to this schedule, the court may very well approve it - is it what you are currently doing. However, with a special child (your autistic son), it is very possible that the court would look to the stability of one home for the children and you having liberal visitation with the kids. It is my view that if your wife would not agree to the schedule, it would be difficult for you to get that schedule.

Lawyer Lori :

In custody, the court looks at several factors, such as: the relationship between the parent and child, how each parent can provide for the child, mental/physical health of all parties, the distance between homes (for school purposes, usually), moral fitness of each parent.

Customer:

She does not agree at all. Currently, I am on a 14 day on 7 day off schedule. I get them my 7 days home. She cannot provide for them finacially. The temporary order ends when the divorce is final. The house is my seperate property. She cannot afford much unless I have to continue to support her. I want to send the children down to my mother. She stayed home with them because I paid for it all. I would rather pay my mom. Is this an option?

Lawyer Lori :

Unfortunately, that would only be an option if you could prove that she was not a proper person to have custody of the children and that would most likely be if she had harmed the children. I misunderstood your work schedule and thought it was 7 days on and 7 days off. If it is 7 days off and then 14 on, it is possible that you could get most of those days off with the kids especially if you live close enough to get them to school, etc. You may have to get something from your son's doctor or counselor that he could deal with it.

Lawyer Lori :

As for your preference to send the children to your mother, I can understand that, but first you would have to show that the children would be in harm's way if they stayed with their mother and not just that their mother could not support them in the fashion that you (or your mother)) could.

Customer:

I am trying to get on the 7/7 work schedule. She is telling me in advance she does not agree with that type of custody. I have them now for my full 7 days off. However, when my schedule changes then I want them more. This is a difficult situation that I feel she brought on herself. I guess I will try to deny the support and may be then she will accept the consequences of her actions for once. Thank you for your time. This was really helpful. I guess I will just have to see how the final support hearing goes. I can't believe she is even asking for it. Does this last the rest of her life? (Final Support) We were only married 7 years. She is 35.

Lawyer Lori :

The court should look at several factors including the length of marriage, earning capacity (so how did she support herself before the marriage), does she need additional training to be employable, her age and health. So I don't see this lasting for the remainder of her life.

Lawyer Lori :

Also, if she remarries or lives with another man could end the support obligation.

Customer:

Okay well thank you. I guess your basically saying adultry is going to be an uphill battle.

Lawyer Lori :

I'm afraid so. But, worth a try - good luck,

Lawyer Lori, Attorney
Category: Legal
Satisfied Customers: 2150
Experience: 10 years of legal experience.
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